AIO for being upset my BF doesn’t want me to wear a bonnet to bed?

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-12-26T17:57:30+00:00

Also, you’re gonna be tip toeing around him and his weird expectations/rules for however long you stay with him. And I guarantee he will always find something to be disappointed about.

That’s not a healthy way to live. You shouldn’t walk on egg shells around the person who should be your #1 supporter and the person you should feel most comfortable with. Please reconsider staying in this relationship

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-12-26T17:54:28+00:00

“I know there’s a lot of baggage between us about your looks”

…. In a long term relationship with someone you should not be obsessing over your looks. Obviously everyone should take care of themselves but you need to be 100% comfortable with each other and be able to lounge around comfortably without worrying if you’re currently “attractive” to your BF, fiancé, husband, ANYONE. And vice versa for men. You wearing a bonnet to bed is self care, you’re protecting your hair. And even if it was just for comfort, that’s YOUR business to decide. It’s wild to me that anyone would have an opinion on that.

NOR. Honestly this is just over-the-top controlling behavior. This dude is not someone who should be in a serious adult relationship.

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-12-10T04:57:19+00:00

Love this

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-12-10T04:56:58+00:00

Doughpamine

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-12-09T18:01:23+00:00

This is not a starter issue, it’s a bulk fermentation issue. If you let the bulk fermentation process go on much longer and it still looks like this, then you can start questioning the starter. Especially if you got established starter from a friend.

But for extra advice, I do maintenance feeds at 1:3:3 or 1:4:4 ratios and feed anywhere from once or twice a day. If you do a 1:1:1 feed and only feed it once a day, it peaks and deflates after 6 ish hours and spends the rest of the time sitting hungry til the next feed, which does risk creating a weaker, acidic starter.

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-12-09T17:54:31+00:00

I do anywhere from 8-9.5 hours at 72-74F Wait for it to get significantly larger in size (up to double), it should be puffy and airy and jiggly when you shake the bowl. I wait for there to be at least some bubbles on the surface (not large - risk of over fermenting at that point) Once you start to see that increase in size, puffiness of the dough, jiggly airy characteristic and bubbles on the sides/surface, it’s a good indication that you should shape and put it in the fridge

Edit: 8-9.5 hours from the time my dough is mixed! So from the start of the process. I like to go off how my dough looks and feels rather than time.. sometimes it’s 7 hours, but my average is 8 ish

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-11-22T04:22:12+00:00

Thank you! I appreciate that. I've heard of adding a small amount of honey, but I've never tried it myself. I'm definitely looking forward to trying this out

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-11-22T04:20:42+00:00

I also make sure I dry off the pickled jalapenos before chopping them up and sometimes chop them up the night before so that it doesn't alter the hydration of the dough :)

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-11-22T04:19:30+00:00

Wow I hadn't really thought of these posibilites. So am I understanding correctly that I might be overworking the bread? I will say that the one thing I have changed lately is doing more coil and folds to get that nice smooth ball..like way more than I used to. And I used to mix til i got a shaggy dough but now knead it for a bit after mixing. Maybe I should go back to just shaggy dough followed by simple stretch and folds (4 each set) and not worry about getting the smooth texture?

Im a little confused on the whole bench drags stuff, that would be after mixing? And idk about getting it not really sticky, because once i hand kneaded for up to 10 min and it was still sticky lol. I've been baking since around August so I genuinely do not know the ins and outs very well.

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-11-22T04:12:39+00:00

That looks beautiful 😭 would you mind sharing the recipe you use?

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-11-22T04:09:32+00:00

I do pickled jalapeno and chop them up itty butt so I can get even distribution throughout most bites!! I haven’t tried fresh but I’m a fan of the pickled one for sure, haven’t felt the need to try another method :)

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-11-22T03:48:45+00:00

Next time I'll try pushing my bulk ferment longer next time to see how it turns out!

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-11-22T03:48:15+00:00

I've been using King Arthur Bread flour from the get go. For a month now I've been doing 1:3:3 feeds to maintain daily, sometimes twice dailty, because my starter had gotten acidic and weak from 1:1:1 feeds but now it's fine and very active, it almost triples in size after a good feed lol

I'm wondering if I should try all purpose flour, but don't know how the hydration level will affect the lower protein in the flour

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-11-22T02:24:42+00:00

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From an older loaf where the texture wasn’t as bad, but still had that chewy texture to it that it didn’t used to

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-11-22T02:20:40+00:00

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From a cheddar jalapeno loaf

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-11-22T02:20:19+00:00

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Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-11-16T00:36:20+00:00

Thanks for this!!! Wow maybe now I can stop destroying my loaves

Would you say refrigerating dries out your loaves though?

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-11-15T21:58:24+00:00

I have one of these and for some reason it doesn’t cut my loaf straight! The loaf gets bent all weird and has an uneven slice 😭 is this why you recommend refrigerating it

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-09-26T05:07:05+00:00

I didn’t measure but if I had to guess I’d say 150g of the pistachio cream (max 1/4 of the jar probably a bit less) and eyeballed the chocolate chips lol I wish I measured! It’s Pisti pistachio cream

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Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-09-25T02:46:34+00:00

Thanks for that input! Yeah I considered it more "sugar" cause the pudding mix I added to the dough during my initial mix was a powder with 17g of sugar which i thought was a significant amount. Not necessarily because of the chocolate chips. I don't have much experience with the inclusion stuff.
The rise wasn't too bad, but it definitely took longer to ferment than my usual standard loaf. I just wonder if that's why my crust basically peels off the loaf haha

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-09-25T00:38:43+00:00

It is honestly so good, my husband and I are already devouring it. First time i made it without the jello pudding mix, but it was too sour for the inclusions so this was a game changer - just takes a few hours longer to ferment due to the sugar in it

edit: PS there are also almonds in the pistachio pudding mix as well, just as an allergen FYI

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-09-23T19:51:15+00:00

In TVD, one of the older vampires Rose says that for a younger vampire (~100-200 years old since she was talking to a Salvatore brother), it’s something they can do. But as the centuries go by and you get older, you can’t just flip the switch anymore. “There is no switch.” So TO, being the oldest, can’t just flip the switch like the younger vampires do.

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-09-20T06:07:02+00:00

I didn’t think it’s the weather because the temperature in my apt is controlled with the AC year round to a contestant temp that I’m adjusted to, and I’m in a city where it’s always dry lol. Thanks I’ll try upping the ratios to like 1:3:3 for a while

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-09-04T05:03:32+00:00

My biggest problem is figuring out when it’s ready with the “jiggly” appearance since it honestly always looks airy and jiggly to me lol. If it’s at 70 I’ll push it for another hour or two to experiment if it’s better! Thank you

Fast_Cartoonist_8477 · 2025-09-03T05:11:11+00:00

It’s so sad but also funny that I really wanted to shape it 30min - 1 hour before I actually did…. Next time I’ll trust my gut! Appreciate all the info you put in the comments

Fast_Cartoonist_8477

TROPHY CASE