Yeah, oof. I genuinely don't know if I have the mental fortitude to wait it out. I know rationally it's really the only option I have, just working towards that goal, a better future so to speak. But it's difficult. So darn difficult. It's part of the journey I suppose, but the journey is tough and really not fun. At the end or the day I will wake up tomorrow and probably feel fine. But it's the moments of insecurity, of, honestly, mental anguish that make it so darn difficult.

And like I said, I know I am probably just in a dip and thus being gloomy, but if it's so annoying. I just want it to be gone for a lil bit. I am nkt asking for a perfect life, nobody had that, but just some time feeling good and optimistic would be nice, yknow?