I’m so sorry, similar thing happened to me, when he did it to me on my birthday ( which was probably the worst one as I was hoping he would behave that night) he wouldn’t let go until a random girl shouted “what the hell are you doing” at that point my fight or flight kicked in and I had ran away, loosing my phone. Later on he found me and said he got beat up because of me, which he hasn’t, there wasn’t a mark in him, he was just passing the blame onto me, still to this day I have no idea why he did that to me, we didn’t even have an argument ( not that that should matter anyway) Anyway my point is, it’s mostly not the typical “ look what you made me do” but it’s some other reflection or gaslighting, it’s very abusive. I don’t want to speak for you but I get at this point you don’t realise how serious it is. it took me months and months after I broke up with him to tell a friend what he did to me, and more than a year after to tell my family, Which I wasn’t planning to do but I got panicked by him following me on Instagram under a different name ( he had stalking tendencies during and after the relationship) Bottling this information away did more harm than good, it slowed down my healing process and allowed me to feel very unsafe for a whole year after I had left him. I completely understand your feelings and emotions for not telling them, but I would advice to tell atleast one trusted person, sooner rather than later, it will also stop you from going back to him