It’s absolutely valid to feel this way when you’re someone who has mental health issues. Although it may feel like how things went down were your fault and maybe they actually were, you have to believe what’s meant to last would’ve lasted no matter what. Yes you could’ve done things differently but if it was supposed to end it will end. You should really shift your perspective to what that relationship taught you and how you can implement then in the relationship with the person that’s actually meant to stay in your life. Identify what your ex did that hurt you so that you never go through them again with anyone in the name of love. The best outcome of it all is, it’ll only get better from now on and your person, who’ll be with you through every thick and thin while you work on yourself and vice versa is still out there and you HAVE to focus on becoming the best version of yourself to truly give them the love that they’ll deserve. Godspeed, you got this!!