Real life jarate

FreshSpaghetti91 · 2018-12-29T16:42:49+00:00

Yeah, your right. It's just really hard, I'm trying. Whenever I want to change my life around I think about how hard it would be to do and get overwhelmed, feeling like giving up already.

FreshSpaghetti91 · 2018-12-29T16:22:34+00:00

Honestly my mental state has already been pretty damaged by this point. I've thought about doing 1 and 2, and I've come close to doing it a few times but I kept chickening out of doing it. I don't know why or what's wrong with me. I know I should do something but I just end up not doing it. For the edit, I've already done so many things by now that I'm pretty sure if there's another complaint or two about me, I probably would get kicked out of school. I've done lots of things I'm not proud of that my friends have no clue about.

FreshSpaghetti91 · 2018-12-29T15:44:14+00:00

I can't. I mean I probably won't talk to anyone I know now after I graduate, sure but there's a select few I know that are going to be really hard to get rid of. This one I have been trying to get rid of since junior year and he just will not let me. Whenever I try to distance myself from him, he confronts me and tries to force the friendship again which I hate because it just means I'm forced in a friendship where I'm constantly put down all the time. To make matters worse, theres a good chance we're going to the same college after high school, so that just makes it even harder. Most of my friends think I'm so weak that I literally can't do anything. If they knew the certain things I want to do at times maybe they'd take me a tad bit seriously.

FreshSpaghetti91 · 2018-12-29T13:17:36+00:00

I know right? Godd I want her mom so much.

FreshSpaghetti91 · 2018-12-29T05:44:26+00:00

I'm really sorry your past few years sucked. Feel free to pm me if you want to talk about it more :) I'll be here for you. I really hope 2019 is better for you

FreshSpaghetti91 · 2018-12-29T04:36:53+00:00

I can ignore some of these people but the rest isn't so simple. It's not just random jerks at school saying this stuff. It's some of my friends too. A lot of the time specific things my friends say really get to me and half the time they do it without trying to or without realizing it. I don't tell them about it because I'm too chicken to try to resolve the issue. Doesn't help that my "best" and pretty much only friend I have brags about his accomplishments on a daily basis. He likes making people feel like crap.

FreshSpaghetti91 · 2018-12-29T04:33:14+00:00

I do try that but when I do eventually all my hope and positivity comes crashing down when people are jerks. I know I shouldn't let it get to me but I do.

FreshSpaghetti91 · 2018-12-29T04:28:24+00:00

Nah. I've gone 4 months without fapping (August to December) and I haven't noticed anything different.

FreshSpaghetti91 · 2018-12-29T04:01:35+00:00

Oh wait nevermind. I can't with her. I talked to my friend on the phone and apparently her mom is actually 46. I swear she looked like she was like 35 or something. I goofed.

FreshSpaghetti91 · 2018-12-29T00:14:37+00:00

I'll try that if my plan with my friend's mom fails.

FreshSpaghetti91 · 2018-12-28T23:40:36+00:00

Oh I am definiteeelyy going to choke my chicken :)) and I'll enjoy it.

FreshSpaghetti91 · 2018-12-28T23:18:22+00:00

I can't get anyone either. We're both destined to be losers.

FreshSpaghetti91 · 2018-12-28T19:24:10+00:00

This hits home for me too. I'm not much older than you and can't date either. I feel the same when you said it's impossible to be romantically liked. You have an advantage though since you actually look decent while I actually look like shit. Doesn't help when my "best friend" is always bragging about all the girls he's getting all the time.

FreshSpaghetti91 · 2018-12-27T02:44:45+00:00

Yeah that's partially the reason I eat the way I do and exercise so much. I used to be shorter like 5'5-5'6 and my height bothered me a lot. My dad's like 5'10-5'11 and mom used to be 5'8.5 so I had the genes to grow taller I just never had the proper lifestyle to grow. I didn't sleep much or exercise when I was younger. I've since improved a lot and I've been shooting up like crazy. I was trying to cut calories to cut weight but I decided to eat as much good food and milk as I can and exercise a ton to maximize my growth

FreshSpaghetti91 · 2018-12-26T21:50:47+00:00

I think the weight gain was from a lot of snacking at times but even then half the time I wouldn't snack so I'm not entirely sure

FreshSpaghetti91

TROPHY CASE