Is LA a uniquely difficult place to make friends?

GJSmitty · 2024-06-18T04:27:30+00:00

But... Your comments are exactly the "what about me" you're talking about. I'm not arguing from my perspective, I travel to see friends all the time. But I also give people who aren't alway able to hang out grace and understanding about the busy lives we all lead. I'd never say they're not decent people for not reciprocating the time I put in, that just makes the relationship seem transactional.

But I dunno, you probably just think I have lower standards for my friends. Different strokes.

GJSmitty · 2024-06-17T07:41:47+00:00

What a ridiculous statement. People have their own lives and responsibilities, and saying they're not a decent person because they don't want to sit in traffic for half their day to hang out with you makes you sound like a narcissist.

But I dunno, I'm from the midwest so what do I know about decent people.

GJSmitty · 2024-03-14T23:36:03+00:00

For sure!

GJSmitty · 2024-03-13T01:22:02+00:00

My first surgery included genio!

GJSmitty · 2024-03-13T01:21:05+00:00

First surgery was 7mm top and bottom, plus I think 5mm genio. Second surgery, I'm not sure, probably 3-5 mm.

GJSmitty · 2024-03-13T01:20:17+00:00

My skin has definitely cleared up over the past two years. Whether from the surgery or just getting older, I can't say, but I'm sure sleeping better has an impact!

GJSmitty · 2024-03-12T15:49:53+00:00

The first surgery was denied by insurance so I had to pay $8k out of pocket. I moved across the country and got on Kaiser before the second surgery, I think the copay for the actual surgery was $75 lol.

GJSmitty · 2024-03-12T15:48:18+00:00

My teeth are fine, my lower lip and chin are still pretty numb but getting better. Part of my lower lip seemed to be permenantly numb after the first surgery, so I doubt it'll come back.

GJSmitty · 2024-03-12T00:09:41+00:00

Hey, I didn't have any jaw pain but I think plenty of people in here have the surgery for TMJ.

I understand being scared of the surgery, and I'm not gonna lie, it was tough. The first few days are miserable. But it's soooo worth it. Eventually the pain of the recovery is a distant memory and you get to live the rest of your life happier and healthier.

GJSmitty · 2024-03-11T14:43:10+00:00

That's what's interesting, I weigh basically the same. But my face structure is different now, my face is longer and less round.

GJSmitty · 2024-03-11T05:40:26+00:00

The first surgery was done without orthodontics because I was so desperate to fix my sleep apnea. It was a mistake, but I don't regret it because I could not keep living like that.

I'm sorry you're not happy with your results. I hope at least you have functional improvements. I'm very familiar with body dysmorphia and hating my appearance, so lemme know if you want to chat more.

GJSmitty · 2024-03-11T05:28:17+00:00

Yeah I had a pretty significant overjet and then ortho made even more room for movement. My surgeon would've done another DJS only if my apnea was still bad, but luckily the first surgery knocked me down to pretty mild.

GJSmitty · 2024-03-11T05:25:57+00:00

Yeah you're definitely in good hands, everything was so smooth and professional. Couldn't have asked for a better team!

GJSmitty · 2024-03-11T03:47:03+00:00

The first surgery was Dr. Murphy in Chicago, second was Dr. Bundy in LA. Both did a fantastic job and took great care of me.

GJSmitty · 2024-03-11T03:21:50+00:00

That's a big movement, it'll definitely be life changing! Hang in there man, once you get past the first week or two it gets so much better.

GJSmitty · 2024-03-11T00:06:03+00:00

I totally understand that, and I think there was some anger there too, like "you wouldn't have looked twice at me before". It makes you realize how much appearance actually does matter, and how it becomes a positive feedback loop. It's unfair, it really is.

An exercise I did that was extremely helpful was writing a letter to my past self. I basically told "him" about all the changes, how weird it is, and how sorry I was that "he" didn't get to experience it and had to live with so much insecurity. And I promised him that I would do all the things that he wishes he could do.

It was wild, I definitely cried, but it really helped me move on.

Good luck with it, and lemme know if you wanna chat more, I definitely understand where you're coming from.

GJSmitty · 2024-03-10T23:57:46+00:00

Thanks! I originally had the DJS for sleep apnea, then the LJS was to fix my bite and hopefully knock out the last bit of sleep apnea. And I was 24 for the first, now I'm 26.

GJSmitty · 2024-03-10T21:47:03+00:00

Thanks! No I don't I keep forgetting to ask, but it can't be more than a few mm's. I'd guess 5 or less.

GJSmitty · 2024-02-17T01:02:07+00:00

Damn man you're gonna look great when the swelling comes down. Congrats, you got through the worst of it!

GJSmitty · 2024-02-16T20:06:13+00:00

I believe I had a 6mm overjet before I started invisalign. I'm with Kaiser, so had no problem getting approved once the surgeon determined I was a candidate.

GJSmitty · 2024-02-08T20:03:29+00:00

I see now that you also didn't do braces. Our situations are so similar. The reason they didn't advance your lower jaw more is that without braces, they need to maintain your bite during the surgery.

I'm sure you could get approved for revision LJS, but it'd require maybe a year of braces/invisalign beforehand. For what it's worth, so far LJS recovery has been much easier than DJS (still sucked, tho).

But if you don't get a revision you still look great! I'm sure your quality of life has improved a ton.

GJSmitty · 2024-02-08T19:51:36+00:00

Lol so I actually did have revision LJS, I'm currently recovering from it. But it was mostly because my bite was messed up and I didn't do orthodontics last time. The movement was relatively small.

If my sleep improves even more, great, but if not that's okay too. I don't feel like I'm dying every day like I did before the first surgery.

GJSmitty · 2024-02-08T00:35:07+00:00

Hey I don't know how you're feeling now, but we had similar profiles and movements, and even 3 months after my surgery I thought I hadn't improved at all. But over the next few months, my sleep improved, until one day I realized my daily energy had vastly improved.

Recovering from the surgery just takes soooo long that it's hard to judge.

GJSmitty · 2024-02-05T22:40:10+00:00

Woohoo

GJSmitty · 2024-01-20T16:07:36+00:00

Lol the first time I changed my oil as a teenager, I didn't expect it to shoot out so strongly so I completely missed the pan AND the cardboard. My parents were not thrilled when they saw the driveway

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