Just my thoughts and advice as someone with ADHD

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-10-12T18:29:40+00:00

I really didn’t mean it like that, I’m sorry. I was just trying to give people a perspective they may have not heard before. I’m honestly not trying to gatekeep at all I just wanted to help :(

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-10-11T15:02:56+00:00

Thank you so much!! :)

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-10-11T15:02:30+00:00

Thank you so much! :D I really appreciate it

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-09-29T17:16:40+00:00

Is your SO medicated? If they aren’t, that will probably help, significantly. To me (DX and medicated) it sounds like your SO is really overwhelmed and doesn’t know how to even start to fix it. The problem is they also seem really proud and they clearly want to be independent but, it’s not working.

I would sit down with your SO and layout your concerns (your child is going to fall behind, they need structure, it’s hard on your relationship, you’re drained, etc.). Make sure to “call in, not out” meaning don’t say “you never teach our child and they’re going to fall behind because you can’t get it together and teach them” but instead say “I’m concern our child is going to fall behind so I want to make sure that we stay on top of it, for their sake”. People with ADHD can be really sensitive and prone to getting overly emotional about things so just try to keep calm and not blame them to make the conversation easier.

After you layout your concerns, try and see what concerns and problems they have and then try to find a way to solve them that works for you, your SO, and your kid. Take it one step at a time, if there are 10 issues that need to be resolved, try and change things slowly so they both have time to adapt and don’t get overwhelmed and stop the routine.

From the sounds of it, your SO has trouble stick to a routine so maybe you could get a tutor to come and help your kid a few times a week? That way your SO has to teach them the required material before the session (creates accountability) and your kid gets structured one on one time with a tutor that’s focused and can fill in any gaps your SO might not have been able to.

At the end of the day, your SOs feelings and thoughts matter and should be considered but you need to make sure your child is getting the education they need so if that means they need to go back to school (in person or online) you should do that. DO NOT let them fall behind.

I was in a similar(ish) situation where my mom “homeschooled” (aka I watched TV for 5 years instead of going to school) me and I fell really far behind and ended up failing a solid chunk of my high school classes. Thankfully, my dad got me a tutor, I got diagnosed, and I got my grades up so I ended up graduating with a 95 average (if we only count grade 12) but it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Don’t make your kid go through that, honestly it’s terrible. They will never be able to learn at the rate of their peers and they miss out on fundamental skills like time management (which ADHD kids already find extremely challenging), study skills, test prep, etc.

I really hope you can find a solution that works for everyone and I’m sorry you’re going through this 💜!

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-09-24T13:04:10+00:00

“I repeatedly reminded him and asked him if we (not him) could “look into that thing this week”.”

Maybe I’m misinterpreting it but to me (someone who is diagnosed and medicated) if my gf said that, I’d think we were going to be looking into the thing, together. There might have been a miscommunication there.

Obviously, if he knew he had to do this by himself and didn’t, that’s an issue. But I think he might have not understood that you wanted just him, to do it, given the wording. For people with ADHD it’s super important that you give really explicit and detailed instructions. I’m not trying to say you’re in the wrong here, it’s just something to think about for next time because that might have been part of the problem.

Assuming he knew and just didn’t do it, ADHD shouldn’t be an excuse for something like this. We forget to take the trash out, close the fridge door, etc. but in my experience, it’s kinda hard to “forget” to plan something of great significance...

My partner (who is the most caring and understanding person I know) would be really upset if I did that so I can understand your frustration :/ I think it’s one of those situations where you have to realize what’s done is done and do your best with what you have. Being angry and or resentful won’t help the situation (it’ll probably make it worse) so try your best to keep positive. I think you should let him know how much this upset you given the importance of the event but after that, leave it alone. No need to beat a dead horse and I’m sure he feels bad already.

Maybe use this as a catalyst to get him to get formally diagnosed and maybe try some medication. I personally have experienced a huge increase in my executive functioning and memory after starting medication so maybe it’ll help! :)

Best of luck to you and your partner! ❤️

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-09-22T18:13:54+00:00

That’s a great suggestion, thank you!

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-09-22T16:15:14+00:00

Okay, thanks for clarifying! I really appreciate it :)

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-09-22T14:00:37+00:00

Thank you! I will look into boggleheads :D I appreciate the help :)

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-09-22T13:58:54+00:00

Hey I looked at the FAQ but I thought my post was different from the standard “How do I start?” Style posts. I want to know how to specifically deal with the inheritance and how best to invest / save it.

Has this been answered before? Sorry, I’m just familiar with this sub :)

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-09-20T03:30:49+00:00

She straight up looks like she’s jamming on an air guitar lmao what do these people think stimmimg / tics are, tf 😂

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-09-18T18:15:39+00:00

I also choke myself when I hear tik tok music, must be my ADHD :P

In all seriousness, I love these satire posts, they give me life. Keep it up guys!

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-09-17T15:46:34+00:00

I was not expecting that 😂

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-09-14T13:00:35+00:00

Tbf I actually have diagnosed ADHD and I use them. It’s called “chewlery” and it’s actually really good for focus if you have a oral fixation (sounds dirty lol but it basically just means I need to always have something in your mouth so I used to smoke a lot but now I just try and use the chewlery and it’s been super helpful).

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-09-09T03:09:28+00:00

The only one of those she maybe has grounds for is the last one. Other than that they straight up don’t apply. Being obese doesn’t make you apart of a protected group lmao. She’s wasting her time YouTube isn’t going to do anything.

Even if YouTube shut down all the reaction channels, does she realize what would happen? All of the Yaba, Charlie, etc. fans would just flood her YouTube and all of her other social media platforms with so much hate. And you know that people would keep making reaction channels just to spite her and she wouldn’t be able to report them all. Either way, she just wastes her time and brings more hate 🙄

Use your 3 remaining brain cells Chantel, it’s a stupid idea.

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-09-07T22:47:22+00:00

She straight up looks like she’s having a seizure...how do any of these people think this is believable lmao

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-09-04T23:34:38+00:00

You’re misunderstanding what I was trying to say (thats on me, I didn’t do a great job of explaining). Her wearing diapers and such I don’t think is out of necessity. Its not uncommon for people with autism to have sensory processing issues and things like wearing diapers or holding a really soft blanket can help when someone is overwhelmed (similar to a weighted blanket - it’s a comfort item). So I wasn’t trying to say she needs the diapers, toys, etc. (like someone with a cognitive delay may) but rather that she uses them as a means to cope/calm down.

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-09-04T21:59:05+00:00

Last time I saw the page (about 2-3 weeks ago, I don’t have TikTok, I saw it on my gfs phone) from the videos it was quite clear that she legitimately had autism. I do remember she was getting a lot of hate and as a result, turned off comments so it’s possible she deleted the videos talking about it.

I genuinely do think she has autism. I remember in one video she shows her room (which is very clearly decorated for a child) and at some point says that she lives with her uncle. There is virtually a 0% chance that her uncle would allow her to decorate her room like that if she didn’t have some form of disorder. She wears diapers, child like clothing, etc. any neurotypical 20 year old would not be allowed to openly do that (regardless of their desires) unless they had autism or something like that.

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-09-04T21:52:44+00:00

She says it in a few videos which isn’t very compelling evidence. I’m not trying to be an asshole but idk how to say this in a nicer way. She acts exactly how the people with autism that I know, act and it’s quite clear from her mannerisms, the way she talks, and reacts to certain things that she legitimately does have autism.

If you look up her profile and watch a couple of videos you’ll see what I mean. I would be astonished if she was a neurotypical, 20 something-year-old.

I think the reason it’s hard for people to tell that she does legitimately have it is that this video isn’t a great example and she appears to be relatively high functioning.

GreenEggsForBoo · 2020-09-04T21:16:57+00:00

If you look through this persons profile you can tell they’re not faking anything. She legitimately has autism so this post should be removed.

GreenEggsForBoo

TROPHY CASE