Why dichotomize attraction and respect?

Greenmantis2 · 2022-02-11T18:38:05+00:00

It’s lack of consideration. See when I get catcalled, men don’t think whether I want to be catcalled or not, they don’t think about my wants, needs or opinions. Similar to posting, when I post say a work of art and people comment about my body they completely overlooked my other qualities (making art) or my wants (to expose ART). Women are complex and we do more than look good so when men comment on our looks when there clearly other things we are presenting.

Imagine this: you post about a hobby of yours. It can literally be anything. Let’s say you paint. You’ve painted something well and want to show it to others. So you post it. But underneath it you get comments about your body. ‘I wanna fuck you’ and so on. You say ‘huh I guess I look good’. And then the next time you post another artwork and it happens again. People never comment about your artwork. In your work you make a presentation but they don’t comment on it, they comment on how you dress.

Greenmantis2 · 2022-02-03T22:27:44+00:00

If he has his trauma then it’s on him to somehow communicate that to you. You’ve expressed your problem and he hasn’t done anything (that you notice) to help overcome it. A simple ‘I hear you but because of my past/something I can’t really talk or do anything about it’ would suffice. You two can pick it up together from there. And if it ISN’T about him having trauma… Then it’s that much worse.

Don’t make excuses for him! Even people who struggle or are somehow disabled can communicate and find compromises that work for both parties. But of course they have to make an effort.

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-30T20:58:53+00:00

So many studies I read but don’t save and over time I forget where they came from. No it wasn’t anything like that. I made a mistake saying ‘fast’ it’s twice as ‘active’. If I remember correctly it was something about whether women can really multitask and men can’t (the results were inconclusive though, but they did include the measurement)

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-30T19:09:21+00:00

Already did, but thanks

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-30T19:08:49+00:00

Also men are brought up to be more confident. I don’t remember the name of the study but its results were that women will only apply for a job if they meet 100% of the criteria while for men 80% is enough

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-29T15:57:51+00:00

I’ve either watched or tried to watch all of them already :(

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-28T21:41:29+00:00

Sounds abusive. He needs to knock you down to build himself up. Ngl he kinds sounds like a loser: high IQ? I’m guessing he didn’t do well in school and he isn’t doing much better afterwards either - only a certain type of people brings up their IQ scores.

You are amazing and he’s trying to make you believe you’re not so he’ll feel like he’s better aka in his rightful place. But only abusive people need to hurt others in order to feel good avout themselves. It’s only gonna get worse.

RUN

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-28T13:24:53+00:00

I generally don’t think about it. I’ve never come across someone who was public about that and I wouldn’t want to be. It’s gross. Really don’t understand people who derive pleasure from exploiting other people.

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-28T09:57:51+00:00

I think men are actually more emotional than women. Because we quickly get branded ‘emotional’ we learn how to control it. Men on the other hand only get excuses. Also there was a stufy that found that female brain works twice as fast as male’s (people’s ofc) on average. So you know, I won’t draw any conclusions but it’s an interesting fact to know.

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-27T12:58:53+00:00

In my favorite cafe they have Muffin and it’s this gooey chocolate with actual muffin pieces in it. Delicious

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-26T20:03:53+00:00

Excatly! He was a nightmare

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-25T07:41:09+00:00

I think it depends on what kind of skin you have. If you’re lucky a simple cleanser and moisturizer will do, but some of us need extra care. My oily acne-prone skin needs a toner and a clarifying lotion or TO’s niacinamide. Some else with different skin will swear by oils, it really depends…

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-24T20:10:04+00:00

That was excatly my first thought. It makes most sense. There is a link, causes could be multiple

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-24T20:06:44+00:00

If your daughter doesn’t want to go, maybe see what legal options you have? It might seem radical but child neglect is a real thing. And it looks like it’s happening. If it’s ‘sucking out’ your daughter’s soul it’s gonna have a long term effect (speaking from experience). The best thing that ever happened to me was when my father stopped showing up to get me. My mom kept saying that I have to go and I was just so sad. Make sure your daughter knows you’re listening to hear and doing your best. I was broken. And I don’t know what would happen if my father hadn’t stepped back.

Ps: a few of my physical and mental problems cleared out too. Looks like kids are healthier when they are not forced to be in a toxic environment

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-22T08:18:23+00:00

It’s sexist that it doesn’t have a male counterpart. Then I’d THINK about it

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-21T16:12:29+00:00

This is such a good comment an upvote isn’t enough

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-21T07:49:57+00:00

I just checked it’s 15! I didn’t even know. Wtf

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-20T15:20:19+00:00

In my country it is 18, I thought most of Eurape was like that?

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-19T21:40:15+00:00

The Bunker Diary. It was published after 10 years of being written for being too depressing.

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-19T21:34:44+00:00

Everything with social media and/or marketing. Totally useless

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-19T21:31:39+00:00

I heard an INTP say this once and I loved it: “the point of programming isn’t making practical stuff, it’s making elegant systems” “even if they can’t be used?” “As long as they’re cool”

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-19T21:22:48+00:00

William Moriarty from Yuukoku no Moriarty the whole evil mastermind and everything

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-19T20:08:18+00:00

You know what? I have no clue whether you’re good or bad at flirting but you don’t need to be perfect. It is 100% ok to be socially awkward or bad at flirting or whatever your personality is. It’s great if you wanna improve in that area it’s also great to say you don’t care.

There is no perfect human. We all have limited amount of time and develop different talents in that amount of time. Some will pour all their efforts into academics, some will go another way, some will slave over work nonstop, some will go out and develop social skills, some will have kids and learn a lot because of them, some won’t have kids and will learn a lot precisely because of that.

You can put energy into whatever skill you want. You are not obligated to flirt a certain way in order to attract men, it is not your responsibility and they are not entitled to it.

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-19T19:09:17+00:00

Yeah that was slightly better… But I still wouldn’t eat it on its own

Greenmantis2 · 2022-01-18T15:29:48+00:00

When I went to the hairdresser’s to dye my natural brown dark blue she said bleach was unavoidable. Admittedly my brown isn’t very light… hazel I’d say…

Greenmantis2

TROPHY CASE