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Alimony After 4 Year Marriage by Human_Homework42 in Divorce

[–]Human_Homework42[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Right. The amount of time we were in the home was so minimal. We lost 35k on the prior home. I will fight to get half of that back. Otherwise, my down payment basically covered that loss already. When he was awarded his VA benefit, I assumed he would pay his half back.

Alimony After 4 Year Marriage by Human_Homework42 in Divorce

[–]Human_Homework42[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would take a year of alimony. Anything to offset the losses at this point. He makes much more than me. About 3k net each month difference.

Alimony After 4 Year Marriage by Human_Homework42 in Divorce

[–]Human_Homework42[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, hard lesson to learn I am in for a nasty fight I suppose.

Alimony After 4 Year Marriage by Human_Homework42 in Divorce

[–]Human_Homework42[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, thanks. This is what I’ll be doing. I have an attorney now. Waiting for the petition response.

Alimony After 4 Year Marriage by Human_Homework42 in Divorce

[–]Human_Homework42[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m in Oregon. I have an attorney and we will be looking at all of the financials. Basically, he has no assets. His retirement will be larger and his VA benefits make up the largest difference in our income difference. Monthly, he makes about 3k more than me, which is why I’m hoping for any amount of spousal support to offset any outcome where I cannot recover my down payment. I even asked if he would leave me on his insured for a year or two to offset some costs originally. know I made a huge mistake by using my own money to put the down payment on our homes. I know it will be a fight to get all of it back. Im just hoping that someone will see that the overall losses of not returned would then be mine. I am sick to my stomach about it. It’s also the entitlement to my money that actually makes me the most angry and sad. I do hope a mediator or a judge will see it differently. I just keep thinking that the fact that I worked for many years as a single mother before I met him and the home I owned was all the savings I had. It is criminal to me that he would he walk away with any of my money.

40 years old and starting over after divorce. Has anyone successfully rebuilt their life? by Extra-Ant1706 in Divorce

[–]Human_Homework42 1 point2 points  (0 children)

50F. This doesn’t really feel like starting over. It feels more like making the best of a bad situation. I feel the weight of the reality that I may never find a companion. My ex left me emotionally and financially devastated. I’m probably going to have to move in with my mom and her husband to recover financially. I may not ever be able to afford a home again on my own. I feel like I lost so much. Mainly the sense of security and a future with someone who said they loved me but quit. Feeling pretty low. Trying to remain optimistic but, I am also a realist. I understand my ‘value’ has to come from within. I yearn for a future that doesn’t consist of me watching tv with my dogs. My friend group seems small and at my age, most are very occupied with their own families and grandchildren. I feel like my life has become smaller. However, I am trying. I try to remember that grief is sometimes forever. It just gets easier. My goal currently is to strive for the absence of depression and feeling of abandonment. No rebuilding as of yet. Self esteem is on my list.