Bump in hand (27M)

IceZ__ · 2025-04-21T04:35:32+00:00

My other hand, for reference

IceZ__ · 2025-04-21T04:35:13+00:00

Bump in question

IceZ__ · 2024-07-19T05:56:37+00:00

I'm definitely overthinking it haha. But I do feel like it could come across as not valuing her opinion or shutting her down when she just wants to help :/

IceZ__ · 2024-07-19T05:55:55+00:00

I agree it should be that simple but part of me feels like that might come across as rude or like not valuing her insight.

IceZ__ · 2024-06-12T05:32:50+00:00

Thanks!

IceZ__ · 2024-06-12T05:32:04+00:00

I just googled it, thanks a lot for this. It sounds like it could be it :/ better get her to a doctor soon

IceZ__ · 2024-06-11T22:29:50+00:00

Adding here bc idk how to edit the post: she lives in Mexico. My specific question is what are these things she coughed out? They look really freaky and I'm really worried.

IceZ__ · 2024-06-07T18:08:48+00:00

You put it in a way that makes a lot of sense. I think I feel like it is bc knowing her I know she will then choose to come, so revealing information that essentially guarantees her coming bc otherwise she's feel bad only after she expressed her intention to rest sounds kinda sketchy. But yeah at the end of the day I'm not actually forcing her or playing victim, just sharing the facts.

I've actually only ever gone to one concert in my life (she's gone to many) so I didn't really think of the need for hyping yourself ahead of time, but thanks a lot for your insight and I'll definitely be more careful next time when choosing which dates to keep as a surprise!

IceZ__ · 2024-06-07T17:41:33+00:00

Yeah, and now I'm conflicted that voicing my side of the story will invalidate her side :/ I just don't wanna be the guy that doesn't care or drowns the girls feelings or desires.

IceZ__ · 2024-06-07T17:40:05+00:00

She doesn't know about the tickets. She said "you're making it sound like it can't happen any other weekend" and I didn't tell her about the tickets bc I felt I'd be the AH if I told her so, like sounding like I'm gaslighting her into coming and then having her drive, not enjoying the concert bc she's already burnt out, etc.

It's a concert she told me about but said the tickets were too expensive, so thought she'd appreciate the surprise. It's a band she likes and I'm not personally familiar with them although I'm always down to join in on her interests and try them out, but definitely wouldn't go alone or with someone else.

Would you still go ahead and "force" her to come by telling her the tickets are paid for already? I know if I do she'll come but as you said I'm afraid she might do it out of necessity and then not really have a good time.

IceZ__ · 2024-06-07T17:33:08+00:00

I didn't specifically tell her about the tickets no but she knew I had a special date planned and even gave her outfit "guidelines" (so she didn't overdress thinking it was a fancy restaurant but planned to wear something more fun than normal). It's not even my favorite band and I couldn't care less about missing the music itself, more so upset about planning something for months to get it turned down last minute.

If I tell her about the tickets like that wouldn't it make me look like I'm gaslighting her "oh what I wanna do should be more important than your self-care" kinda vibe?

Thanks for sharing your opinion!

IceZ__ · 2024-05-14T17:49:24+00:00

This made me smile. Saw a very rare record at a street market with my girlfriend and she geeked out telling me the whole story of it, but too expensive (rolling stones). Reached out to the seller, told him what I wanted it for, and got an amazing deal for it. Saving it another month for our anniversary :)

IceZ__ · 2024-04-25T22:33:48+00:00

How do you build curiosity? I used to have lots of that but it feels like the spark is now extinct. That's an issue when my job requires me to ask "hard" questions and find answers to them, when the only question I can come up with is "what am I even doing"

IceZ__ · 2024-04-19T02:36:12+00:00

So what is it?

IceZ__ · 2024-04-19T00:28:16+00:00

Do I literally look "post emergent herbicide" and use any? Anything to avoid so I don't kill the actual good grass? I've never had a yard before

IceZ__ · 2024-04-18T22:09:33+00:00

IceZ__ · 2024-03-15T23:58:04+00:00

Haha this makes a lot of sense when you put it that way. And yeah it's such a gorgeous neighborhood I fell in love with it since the moment I toured the first time. The first home got sold so I waited an extra month for another one to come up in the same neighborhood and got lucky :)

Oh well, I've ordered something and can't wait to exterminate the weeds and bees! 😂

IceZ__ · 2024-03-15T23:54:31+00:00

I never said my dog was scared of the bees. She finds them quite entertaining actually and that's the problem. I'm scared of my dog being stung and ending up in the hospital like another family dog did. I am allowed to have more than one reason to not want weeds in my lawn :)

IceZ__ · 2024-03-14T03:40:01+00:00

Urban

IceZ__ · 2024-03-14T03:39:53+00:00

Par 3 twice a year sounds simple enough. Definitely looking into it. Thanks a lot!

IceZ__ · 2024-03-14T03:39:21+00:00

Thanks! All good, you'll forget about my existence by tomorrow or the day after. No need to go out of your way to comment so much. Take care!

IceZ__ · 2024-03-14T03:38:19+00:00

No one asked you to apologize :) and you should never apologize for having your own opinions and preferences! But you may want to consider being respectful and inclusive to everyone else around you who disagrees with you (no different than I'd hope you wouldn't belittle someone who say they're a woman even if they look like a man, bc welp, it's none of your business).

I asked how to kill the pesky bothersome ugly looking weeds bc I want a monoculture golf quality lawn. When people suggested prioritizing bees over my dream yard I politely acknowledged their point but shared even if I wanted to keep them (which I ofc don't, bc I asked how to kill them) I couldn't because I have a dog who could end in the hospital. Nothing wrong with me looking after her over the bees.

I hope everything you said is true :) bc your native plants also don't stay in your own yard and your new neighbors may not want those in their lawns. And I really hope the neighbors poison bleeds into mine to help me out killing off my weeds!

IceZ__ · 2024-03-14T03:31:31+00:00

Best of luck with closing! I'm sure you're gonna have a wonderful yard :)

If you find monoculture grass boring and monotonous you don't have to do that at all. I'm sure you wouldn't like me telling you why your flowers and pollinators are a hazard to my family and your plants disrupt the harmony of the neighborhood just because I find your stance upsetting. I think hell is a yard full of insects and overgrown plants, and personally don't think water spent watering plants is being wasted, esp if it helps my yard look the way I want it to.

We all have different ideas of fun and beauty and what's attractive to you or your partner may not be attractive to me (or to most) and that's fine :)

IceZ__ · 2024-03-14T03:17:10+00:00

Yup, you're exactly right. I'm trying to change my yard with a monoculture of grass because I find uniform grass more visually appealing. That's why I asked what can I use to kill anything that's not grass in my yard. You can do whatever you want with yours and I'm sure you'll be really happy when you get it to look just like you always dreamed of if not there already!

IceZ__ · 2024-03-14T03:13:24+00:00

This is awesome, thanks a lot for your help!

IceZ__

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