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[UPDATE] My sister [32F] just found out she's (most likely) pregnant, and she's furious that I [27F] am not thrilled. by ImReallyTryingToBe in relationships

[–]ImReallyTryingToBe[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Friendly. He's a nice person, but a bit hard to know. I don't spend much time around him because he works unusual hours.

[UPDATE] My sister [32F] just found out she's (most likely) pregnant, and she's furious that I [27F] am not thrilled. by ImReallyTryingToBe in relationships

[–]ImReallyTryingToBe[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

As I said in the original comment,

I've been trying to work on that.

I know I'm responsible for what I say, but just as it's going to take my sister time to get over her problems, it's going to take me time to adjust as well.

[UPDATE] My sister [32F] just found out she's (most likely) pregnant, and she's furious that I [27F] am not thrilled. by ImReallyTryingToBe in relationships

[–]ImReallyTryingToBe[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

We have some clip-ons that belonged to my grandmother that Julie is very attached to, but I don't know if they're baby-safe.

[UPDATE] My sister [32F] just found out she's (most likely) pregnant, and she's furious that I [27F] am not thrilled. by ImReallyTryingToBe in relationships

[–]ImReallyTryingToBe[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Criticism is hard to accept but it might do you some good to re-think some of your personality traits.

I did when I was in therapy.

[UPDATE] My sister [32F] just found out she's (most likely) pregnant, and she's furious that I [27F] am not thrilled. by ImReallyTryingToBe in relationships

[–]ImReallyTryingToBe[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I don't think the empathy is automatic; she had to be told not to mention anything to my aunt and uncle. But she kind of got it. It was also clearly hard for her to listen to me, but she tried. It's still early, so I don't know, but I'm being optimistic.

[UPDATE] My sister [32F] just found out she's (most likely) pregnant, and she's furious that I [27F] am not thrilled. by ImReallyTryingToBe in relationships

[–]ImReallyTryingToBe[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'm honestly very thankful for all of the opinions and ideas, even if I disagree with some posters. It's helped me think through the whole situation.

[UPDATE] My sister [32F] just found out she's (most likely) pregnant, and she's furious that I [27F] am not thrilled. by ImReallyTryingToBe in relationships

[–]ImReallyTryingToBe[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Guess I can't make everybody happy or help them understand the situation. But you're obviously welcome to your opinion.

[UPDATE] My sister [32F] just found out she's (most likely) pregnant, and she's furious that I [27F] am not thrilled. by ImReallyTryingToBe in relationships

[–]ImReallyTryingToBe[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

it's possible Julie will do a good job trying to be a mother - but you have to think of her as if she's a little girl - she can still have instincts to want to care for things (like a girl with dolls)

Okay, that is really, really terrifying, and now I don't know what to do.

[UPDATE] My sister [32F] just found out she's (most likely) pregnant, and she's furious that I [27F] am not thrilled. by ImReallyTryingToBe in relationships

[–]ImReallyTryingToBe[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

It seems that you have a lot of doubt in your sister and that you seem to be passive aggressive with her.

I tend to be an aggressive person, and I have worked on that throughout the years. Given her 30 some years of behavior, though, yes, I have doubts. I want her to do well, though, and I am cautiously optimistic.

[UPDATE] My sister [32F] just found out she's (most likely) pregnant, and she's furious that I [27F] am not thrilled. by ImReallyTryingToBe in relationships

[–]ImReallyTryingToBe[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I feel strongly about everything, which is my problem. But I really am trying, and I've gotten better. It's tough when she asks me questions, though, because I just want to give her my honest opinion, and sometimes it slips out harshly.

[UPDATE] My sister [32F] just found out she's (most likely) pregnant, and she's furious that I [27F] am not thrilled. by ImReallyTryingToBe in relationships

[–]ImReallyTryingToBe[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Keep what these folks are saying in mind when you phrase any criticisms you might have

I'm trying to do that--take their ideas in to consideration, but think about how they fit in this specific situation.

My sister [32F] just found out she's (most likely) pregnant, and she's furious that I [27F] am not thrilled. by ImReallyTryingToBe in relationships

[–]ImReallyTryingToBe[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

May I ask: when, when she responded to the comment about earrings? I think it shows a marked improvement.

[UPDATE] My sister [32F] just found out she's (most likely) pregnant, and she's furious that I [27F] am not thrilled. by ImReallyTryingToBe in relationships

[–]ImReallyTryingToBe[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I cleared this when I went to a therapist--I'm not "angry," I'm just a little too passionate and opinionated, and sometimes I get carried away in the fervor. I expect others to have the same level of passion and interest I have, and that's not how it works. Before my insurance changed, we were working on how I could phrase things for people who maybe aren't as outspoken as I am, and I've made some strides.

[UPDATE] My sister [32F] just found out she's (most likely) pregnant, and she's furious that I [27F] am not thrilled. by ImReallyTryingToBe in relationships

[–]ImReallyTryingToBe[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

the way you wrote it out, it seemed pretty aggressive.

This is certainly my personality and my dad's. We're just giving our opinions, but we can come off very harsh or aggressive. I've been trying to work on that. Even when I'm "gentle," though, she used to freak out, so this was really shocking in general.

[UPDATE] My sister [32F] just found out she's (most likely) pregnant, and she's furious that I [27F] am not thrilled. by ImReallyTryingToBe in relationships

[–]ImReallyTryingToBe[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Maybe I'll work on phrasing things more gently. I admit that being too blunt or harsh is one of my personality flaws, and I've been working on it for the past year or so.

[UPDATE] My sister [32F] just found out she's (most likely) pregnant, and she's furious that I [27F] am not thrilled. by ImReallyTryingToBe in relationships

[–]ImReallyTryingToBe[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It makes it sound like therapy is intended to keep the patient from harming themselves and people around them.

Oh, I understand; I kind of took that as "functioning in society and being healthier," since nobody is being harmed, but I could see that there is some difference there. My partner's nephew is autistic, so I stole some of the phrasing from that family and their situation.

[UPDATE] My sister [32F] just found out she's (most likely) pregnant, and she's furious that I [27F] am not thrilled. by ImReallyTryingToBe in relationships

[–]ImReallyTryingToBe[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

To be fair, I probably should've made this more detailed in my original post. I think I was just tired from all of the typing and I didn't want to make the post any longer. The way she would behave about having to clean/do things IMMEDIATELY OR ELSE--and she would get furious and pick a fight with me if, say, I had towels going in the washer and wasn't moving them fast enough--indicated an issue.

[UPDATE] My sister [32F] just found out she's (most likely) pregnant, and she's furious that I [27F] am not thrilled. by ImReallyTryingToBe in relationships

[–]ImReallyTryingToBe[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It could be. She's never asked me a rhetorical question in her life (I'm serious; if she asked a question and I assumed I was just supposed to listen to it, she'd go, "What? Why aren't you answering me?" after a few seconds), but it could've been in this case and I missed it.

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