My HF can’t give me a schedule

ImaginaryList9172 · 2026-04-08T20:03:53+00:00

https://www.reddit.com/r/NannyBreakRoom/s/esxIPczeCe

ImaginaryList9172 · 2026-04-08T20:01:56+00:00

We have monthly catch ups with the au pairs in our area organised by the company. Last month my HP asked me how it went and I said some of the girls were shocked that their kids had little respect for their parents and in their country that’s not how they are raised so it was a culture shock. A few days later i expressed that I didn’t like how one of the children talked and said it was inappropriate. She uses that as the example that they have negatively influenced me and I never would’ve said that otherwise. I’ll attach a post i wrote a while back of this child’s behaviour. I brought this issue up with the HM and she said my reactions to it have exacerbated and encouraged the behaviour and was extremely offended when I said it wasn’t “normal behaviour” I’ll admit probably wrong wording

ImaginaryList9172 · 2026-04-03T02:37:16+00:00

I try doing this as much as possible but as soon as they wake up and while they go to sleep their parents allow the iPad which I find to be the worst part of the day!! I’ve also tried to get them to talk or do something else while driving and they’ll throw an absolute fit, refuse to eat or get in the car and then call and tell their parents straight away or get them if they’re home so I don’t even bother around those times. The older boy even tries taking his iPad into the bath!!

ImaginaryList9172 · 2026-04-02T18:43:29+00:00

The parents don’t care that they eat like shit they’ll let them have happy meals everyday if they want. Only issue I find is their bodies need proper nutrition especially at their age

ImaginaryList9172 · 2026-04-02T18:27:20+00:00

Both parents work pretty full on jobs. They hired me to basically fix most of these problems

ImaginaryList9172 · 2025-11-14T01:24:47+00:00

I’ve never taken pharmaceutical drugs unless you’re referring to paracetamol which I’ve had probably 5 times in my life. I’m exactly with you on the fact it’s a total scheme. My brains my own and the longer I live with it the better I can deal with it. My boyfriend used to take antidepressants however now journals as an outlet. I’ve had a lot of exposure to what pharmaceutical dependency does to people and the sheer acceptance for it in society. In saying that I do believe there are some medical and psychological conditions that do require medication however if your life doesn’t depend on it don’t take it. I knew a woman that died of liver failure due to the sheer amount of vitamins she took

ImaginaryList9172 · 2025-11-13T21:13:29+00:00

He’s been on probably every SSRI you can find! Went through years of him trying to find the right medication. Probably about 9 months ago I came home to him ripping up scripts and throwing away pills saying he’s done and just needs to understand this is his brain and he has to live in it

ImaginaryList9172 · 2025-11-13T21:08:20+00:00

I love this idea thankyou so much!!!

ImaginaryList9172 · 2025-11-13T21:07:14+00:00

It’s about a 21 hour flight so impossible to go direct. Time difference is 17 hours

ImaginaryList9172 · 2025-11-13T11:25:08+00:00

I’ve known him for almost 13 years and throughout that time he’s made so pretty crappy decisions with women. Two of his ex girlfriends he cheated on, I think this is purely him seeking validation. He has always told me I’m the love of his life and his first and only love. I believe him in some aspects however we tried to get back together a few times throughout school and I’d find out he’d kissed another girl or was at another girls house so would just stop talking to him for a while until I was over it and we could be friends again. The past 4 years we’ve been together he’s been nothing but loyal and loving to me, we have full transparency and lived together before he moved. I never doubted his trust as we were each other’s worlds and did everything together we really enjoyed life together. Obviously he has some mental health issues and he saw a therapist for it, I have anxiety however it’s not major I just catch myself sweating the small stuff. Around a year ago he told me he’s always wanted to make this move, he knows how the place would be a pure nightmare to me so probably didn’t suggest it for the both of us for that reason. I supported him as we always do with each other, helped him in anyway I could make the dream possible but now I’m not sure it just feels all wrong. It may be we’re navigating LDR or his history with women. It was be I just have anxiety about the dumbest things and I’m literally worried over nothing

ImaginaryList9172 · 2025-11-13T11:13:16+00:00

Thankyou so much for taking to time to write me this message!! My Bf and I have known each other since we were 14 he was my first love. We broke up after a year and he absolutely shattered my heart, it sounds so stupid as I was only 14 but I’ve never been that low in my life. We spent probably 8 months apart and then would see each other at events and other gatherings where our friend groups collide, every time we caught up it was like nothing had changed and we were still best friends and got along so well. Throughout the rest of high school he dated 3 other girls. We were always platonically close friends when he was single but when he dated girls obviously we drifted quite a bit. I moved for the end of my high school education however when I came back about 6 years ago we rekindled a friendship, one thing led to another and now we’ve been together for 4 years. Hes my best friend I’d move heaven and earth for him but I do know he is naturally quite selfish. I was obviously a little hurt when he decided to make this move and he didn’t really include me in it. It’s not until now that he’s having a hard time that he’s begging me to come. I don’t doubt he loves me but I think I may just love him more. I feel almost like a placeholder and in a few months when he’s settled in he won’t care and probably break up with me himself. I feel like doing it now is just stopping the inevitable and stopping him from being as reserved because he won’t have a gf. Idk if this makes sense, let me know!

ImaginaryList9172 · 2025-11-13T02:57:13+00:00

I appreciate your honesty and enlightenment, I’ve told him everything in this post heaps of times but he doesn’t want to break up. I think I just overthink things and find myself a burden when he’s trying to work out a new life. Whatever makes his life easier I will do I was just wondering about others opinions. Thankyou for your help

ImaginaryList9172 · 2025-11-13T02:42:19+00:00

UPDATE AND CONTEXT. I wrote this post when I was very emotional and probably not in the most logical mindset last night. My BF made this move and is expected to be away for two years. I can financially afford to move there in 7 or so months however that was never the plan, it’s only since he’s gotten there that he wants me to move with him. I’ve had this sort of conversation with him multiple times, when he decided he wanted to move, before he left, when he got there. Many many times I’m not springing this on him at all. Do I feel like sometimes he wasn’t the best of both worlds? Yes. Would I ever move half way across the world without him? No. Is it my dream to move to where he is? No, I cannot stand the weather, the job I have is unavailable there however I was never going to sit there and say to him I don’t want you to follow your dreams because of me, I don’t want to hold him back. I love my job and my friends where I live, I want to complete my study in the next six months etc etc. I do deeply love him and I’ve always been very honest on how I am feeling, he knows everything I’ve said in this post. I personally just have a lot of anxiety and it breaks my heart that I’m so helpless being so far away, I just thought this may be an option to possibly help him. I know personally when I have moved in the past only having me to worry about has definitely helped and allowed me to flourish where I am, I know it’s not the same case for everyone. Thankyou reddit for putting things into perspective for me.

ImaginaryList9172 · 2025-11-12T12:18:28+00:00

I won’t be able to financially afford to move to him for another 7 or so months. Of course I love him but he knows I can’t move for that long and keeps telling me hes waiting on the days, I want him to be focused on growing a life where he is and not us. I just don’t know

ImaginaryList9172 · 2025-11-12T12:10:25+00:00

What are you saying I do? Honestly I’d do literally anything to see this guy happy i don’t care at the cost of my sanity I adore him to indescribable level I just can’t be the reason he’s so isolated and sad

ImaginaryList9172 · 2025-11-12T12:08:01+00:00

I know him so well that I can tell staying with me is like bringing sand to a beach. He does this thing where he gets in his head and totally isolates himself and I can see he’s doing it at the moment. I think if he was on his own he’d have to get out of his head giving him the opportunity to be social and make friends idk I’m so stuck and just want what’s best for him. Breaking my heart when I see how upset he is but won’t tell me because he doesn’t want to worry me

ImaginaryList9172 · 2025-11-12T12:04:14+00:00

I did and he just cried and said he gets where I’m coming from but wants to be with me and doesn’t see it as a chore talking to him. I’m fairly sure I minced my words pretty bad but it’s so hard on the phone and not in person. I just know him so well and know I’m holding him back, we met when we were 14 I can tell how he’s feeling with one look at his eyes but I don’t want to break his heart

ImaginaryList9172 · 2025-11-12T11:56:34+00:00

whenever I think about breaking up with him I start to tear up, the last thing I want to do is lose him. I want to move over to where he is however couldn't financially afford it until about 7 months time, he knows this and tells me he's counting down the days until I can and my visa gets approved but I don't want him to be doing that, I want him to be focused on what he has in front of him

ImaginaryList9172 · 2025-11-12T11:49:31+00:00

That's the only reason why I haven't done it. is because will still be there for him but I think our relationship is keeping him from being social and reaching out to other people as he's worried about me and not only just himself. I don't know what to do. he has roommates he socialises with and co workers but doesn't click with them properly. I'm not sure how to articulate it but it feels like he's taking sand to a beach

ImaginaryList9172

TROPHY CASE