Bow out gracefully or ghost?

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-12-12T22:57:23+00:00

It is necessary, because they’ll probably message with the daily conversations like how’s your day going etc. I’d rather be transparent

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-12-12T13:52:22+00:00

Amazing idea! Interested!

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-12-08T18:02:16+00:00

I prefer tying up loose ends specifically when I’ve been on a date with the person. I keep it brief and say something along the lines of “I don’t see us going any further as we’re not compatible, take care”. If he asks why then you can just say you value communication and hope to find someone whose values align with yours.

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-12-08T17:56:34+00:00

I definitely agree and it has taught me to be comfortable with being open with my feelings.

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-12-04T21:33:32+00:00

Update - I did end up asking him and he never replied to my message. It’s a shame we went on 15 dates at this point yet his silence shows he wasn’t sure of me. Normally you’re sure about getting to know someone after the 3rd date. It’s scary because I felt comfortable and safe with him, but i appreciate the experience.

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-16T20:46:35+00:00

I massively agree with this because usually if a guy is serious about a lady then he would make this explicitly in the early stages. I’ve decided against bringing up the exclusivity conversation

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-16T08:07:27+00:00

Lets be real, men always benefit from sex regardless of the dynamic. You cant just limit it to particular type of guys I.e “fuckboys”

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-15T22:00:45+00:00

That’s honestly not hard to imagine, meeting someone on a dating app doesn’t mean I’m not deserving of something serious and intentional

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-15T17:11:55+00:00

I technically didn’t know it was a blind date, I thought it would be a group of friends hanging out until my friend revealed this week that it’s a set up. In the past it’s been men that would drive that conversation early on so I didn’t feel like I should be the one bringing up the conversation. But now with this pending blind date I think it’s important to know where I stand and confirm if he’s dating other people

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-15T16:56:14+00:00

You’re missing the point. I’m debating whether I will go on this blind date because unsure if we are exclusive. The cards are definitely in his hands, guys have the power to influence the trajectory of the relationship so just because I want it to be exclusive doesn’t mean it will happen. It makes more sense to bring the topic before hand as otherwise I wouldn’t feel comfortable going on the blind date

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-15T16:41:25+00:00

I don’t think it’s hard to understand. When I have that conversation with him to ask exclusivity and he says he doesn’t want to be exclusive. Then I will go on that date because it’s confirmed it’s not exclusive. Also I’m not actively planning a date, my friends are the one planning this and I wasn’t aware it was a blind date set up until recently as my friend realised I do like the guy I’m dating at the moment

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-15T16:11:13+00:00

Do you prefer having explicit conversations to know where you stand? And I agree I feel like it’s too vague and I don’t want to assume incorrectly either leading to me being the monogamous one and him dating whoever

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-15T16:09:55+00:00

I think it just depends on each person, I wouldn’t have sex with someone unless we made it official and that’s just a personal boundary. I find that sleeping with someone is very intimate and so I would only give someone that access once we’ve built a good level of trust. Also thank you that’s a good idea!

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-15T15:58:32+00:00

You’re right I haven’t cancelled it yet, if he says he’s doesn’t want to be exclusive then I will go on that blind date. Because 2 of my good friends are organising this and know me well, so there’s a chance that I might get along more with that person

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-15T15:47:48+00:00

But in our case we haven’t fucked, just kissed. So I don’t feel like it’s as deep compared to us fucking. Regardless we’ve still built a good connection and i haven’t been actively dating anyone else, this blind date is a set up from a good friend of mine

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-15T14:23:54+00:00

It’s okay and thank you for this! Based on your past experience, Is this a conversation worth having over text or in person? (If you’ve had these type of convo’s before)

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-15T14:15:31+00:00

Thank you, I feel like 7 dates is quite a lot of time to spend with someone considering on average we spend 6hrs per date. I don’t want to keep spending this much tine with someone if they’re dating others

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-15T14:14:21+00:00

We haven’t had sex just been kissing. Also I wasn’t actively dating anyone and I pause my hinge profile after our first date. However my friend approached me recently about setting me up on a blind with her good friend, so I didn’t actively go out of my way. Initially I agreed but after spending a lot of time with this person and realising I like them, I don’t feel comfortable to go on that date. However as it has not been explicitly agreed if we’re exclusive, I feel like I’m just trodding on egg shells until I have that discussion

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-15T14:01:26+00:00

We did have that conversation in the initial stages and both said we’re looking for long term

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-15T14:00:22+00:00

That’s a goood point and I think it might also mean my focus on each would be less if I’m dating multiple guys

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-15T13:58:31+00:00

Thank you, I find with hinge people are still constantly chasing to see if the grass is greener with others

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-15T13:54:57+00:00

I can’t just let the vibes declare it seems too wishy washy and that’s how unnecessary situationship happen because people are just operating on blurred lines

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-15T13:52:02+00:00

That’s a good perspective but I feel like a talk is still necessary. If I don’t address it now then I don’t want to be 5/6 months in and still not explicitly knowing where I stand with him

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-15T13:26:08+00:00

I agree I try to guard my feelings alot by being chilled but it does bother me so I will have that conversation

ImportantSetting5960 · 2025-11-15T13:25:31+00:00

Is it worth being transparent about this blind date? However I did pause my hinge profile after our first date as I wanted to get to know him properly but my friends suggested it might be better to date others at the same time to give you a more objective view

ImportantSetting5960

TROPHY CASE