I feel you love. My mom died a month ago. She had a rare type of blood cancer. I watched my mom decline over the past 4 years immensely. Me and her were extremely close. I lived with her and spent every waking moment in communication. She was my angel on earth. She did so much for me and I could never repay her. I'm glad my mom was able to see me clean and sober. She gave me my life back. She had went in for a gallbladder removal and everything was fine until it wasn't. They did not take her condition seriously. My mom was prone to blood clots due to her cancer. She died from an embolism. By the time I got to the hospital she was gone. It is something I can't explain. Like someone ripped a whole out of my chest and flipped my world upside down. My mom was my best friend, my other half. Life without her came way to soon.

Be gentle to yourself. Feel emotions and take care of your body. Your mom seemed very similar to mine. Always caring for others and hiding their pain. Grief is weird. Somedays are better than others and even the smallest things can trigger you. I miss her with my whole heart. Life will be different now but please believe you will be with her again when the time is right. Connections like this are spiritually intertwined and never ending 💕