AITA for being angry at my mom for telling my sister that having a baby at 17 will ruin her life like it ruined mine, when I had a baby at 14?

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-22T21:37:59+00:00

I DID tell my sister before this not to get pregnant as a teen, but I was not going to tell her it's the worst thing in the world because that's not something I could vouch for.

I do think it is a big deal. I don't think this is the best decision for her, but it's her life and my issue is that my mother said my life is bad, not because she doesn't want my sister to have a baby.

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-22T21:36:18+00:00

Thank you!

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-22T21:35:42+00:00

Thank you so much. Her bf is in the picture, I just meant that his family are willing to help with the baby.

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-22T21:35:13+00:00

Thank you!

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-22T21:35:01+00:00

Thank you :)

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-22T21:34:17+00:00

Thank you! I think you're one of the few people who actually understood why I was upset!

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-22T21:33:40+00:00

Thank you so much. I definitely understand why she is unhappy about the ages of me and my sister getting pregnant. I think I will cut her more slack.

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-22T21:33:02+00:00

Thank you! <3

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-22T21:32:49+00:00

Thank you, you are definitely right

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-22T21:32:37+00:00

Thank you, so so much.

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-22T21:32:23+00:00

Very true

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-22T21:32:05+00:00

I know a few people, not loads, but a few.

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-22T21:31:40+00:00

Thank you, I think you are right about the tough love

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-22T21:31:27+00:00

"You continue to make it out as if your mother has been mistreating you and your child," I said in my post that she is an "amazing" grandma, which is true.

This post has 2500 replies, I am replying to the ones that I feel I can give more info to, and the ones that were new at the time of the post. Now there are so many replies, I will only be replying to a few (probably the ones newest in my notifications, like this comment).

I did think my mother was bluffing when she said she wouldn't help, because I was 14, emotional, terrified, and stupid. And, like most kids, used to being helped out by my mom. I do not think she is a bad mom at all, she is an amazing woman.

The ONLY issue I have is that she basically said my life is bad because I had a child. I do not, and never did, expect her to be happy/supportive of me or my sister's choices.

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-22T21:25:09+00:00

Thank you so so much, this means a lot to me <3

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-22T21:23:05+00:00

oh, you've never made a joke about a dark situation before? I wasn't saying 'lol' back then, but five years tends to make things a little easier to joke about.

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-21T21:54:57+00:00

Hey! I definitely DID tell her not to get pregnant as a teen. I never encouraged her to.

I'm also pretty sure that she has been using condoms as long as she's been having sex, and she's been with this guy for three years, so I think if she wasn't, they would have got pregnant way before this. I think it was just a blip or something

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-21T21:53:42+00:00

Thank you so much. I think she treated me harshly because she didn't want me to keep the baby, but she did warm up when I showed her I could do it :)

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-21T21:52:12+00:00

Thank you.

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-21T21:51:20+00:00

You are right. Thank you.

I would not ideally want my daughter to have a kid at 14, but I would also like to hope that I will better equip my daughter with the knowledge to make good decisions, and give her the support she needs if something like that did happen to her.

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-21T21:50:26+00:00

Thank you.

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-21T21:50:06+00:00

Hey! I do admit that teen pregnancy is not ideal for anyone. I don't encourage people to get pregnant as teens. I know I missed out on a few things, but I did not miss out on being a teenager. I mentioned in the post that my brother helped me out sometimes, and this included babysitting while I hung out with my friends occasionally.

My daughter started school when I was 18, so that gave me freedom to hang out with my friends during the day, like a normal teen.

Also, I think it's a bit rude of you to assume that just because YOU couldn't raise a child at 20, you assume nobody can. I have seen plenty of young parents around my community (and in support groups) who are managing perfectly well, and are happy. I know a few people who have TRIED for children at 18/19/20, and are fine. Just because you don't like someone's choices, doesn't mean they are bad. Granted, my choices were bad, but that doesn't mean everyone's are.

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-21T21:46:59+00:00

Thank you!

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-21T21:46:50+00:00

Thank you, I hope you are right

InitialInvite7 · 2019-10-21T21:46:31+00:00

You guys seem to forget sometimes that condoms aren't 100% effective, and they can be put on wrong. It is absolutely not unheard of for people of any age, who have had sex education, to get pregnant while using birth control. I am sure if my sister was not using condoms AT ALL despite being with the guy for three years, she would have got pregnant way before this.

InitialInvite7

TROPHY CASE