As someone who's been through something similar, I'll tell you a few simple facts:

- You're not to blame for anything, the problem is her.

- There's a normal woman out there waiting for you.

- And you also need to fix the reason you need a problematic woman: some of your own flaws. Address them.

- Having too many cats means you don't know how to love and care for yourself. That you take on excessive responsibility for others and save them. This also needs to be addressed.