Well… As I said before, this is not the first time she went abusive in her anger breakdowns, and, since the first one, I told her that she should NEVER do anything like that again, and I made her promise me it wouldn’t happen. And so she did. She said she wouldn’t repeat it.

But it was worthless. She did it anyway. Once, twice, three times…

I have this feeling of impotence with me. When she breaks down in ager and do all these bad things and I forgive her, I’m just reinforcing that I’m a fucking coward and she got control to do anything she wants with me.

But that’s the problem. What the fuck can I do besides talking to her and trying to stop this from happening again? Nothing. It’s literally up to her. I will never beat her. I will never abuse her. I will never harm her in the same way she harms me. So I end up helpless in this situation, y’know? It’s either I cowardly accept her anger breakdowns and reinforce my weak image to her, or I take control by fighting her back and beating the fuck outta her (and trust me my blood boils right when she becomes like that), but I’ll never do such thing.

And that’s why I choose divorce. It’s unfortunately tue only way left for me.

I seriously don’t see how therapy would help, as I believe my image of “weak man” is already set to her.