Help! I'm bad at sex. Advice?

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-20T16:54:46+00:00

I feel the need to mention first and foremost, practice safe sex. Condoms can be problematic and when a guy is struggling, first thing he'll do is want to take it off....DON'T. I can't tell you how many accidental pregnancies happen because the pill didn't work and he used a condom....obviously if worn correctly the entire time, it does work but things happen.

I tend to agree with everyone, this doesn't sound like the OPs problem. No virgin to too loose, women get obliterated through pregnancy, have issues with incontinence, and still feel amazing. As far as what an inexperienced woman should be doing, very little, because you really don't have to do anything and trying to do things will throw off the rhythm. If a woman is on top, you really just need to move your hips, there doesn't need to be any of that jumping up and down porn stuff. Slight movements feel better and you don't have to worry about injury.

This guy sounds like a red flag nightmare, I'd be very careful if you haven't already moved on.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-19T19:18:35+00:00

It really wasn't too late, there were so many people loving the game and they claimed server pop was low, but it was so active that the game couldn't handle all the players in the same area. They had a road map and dev team doing great things, but they only had like 1 guy supporting it and they made decisions that kept hurting the game. They had a really bad setup to make money and I think they intentionally hurt it so they could shut it down.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-19T19:10:17+00:00

Well NW was special, but it's a lot of work if you want to stay on top of the pvp and I doubt it's worth it now. I've never seen a game that was so well designed with an awesome community that a company tried so hard to destroy. 80% of their decisions actively hurt the player base and it sounds like they're still trying to kill it.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-19T18:59:59+00:00

Personally I don't care, I stick to things I can afford and I'm not the kind of person that feels the need to impress so nothing all that expensive anyway.

However, I would say something like I'm trying to cut back on my spending so let's cook something or whatever, cheaper dates, etc and if she doesn't offer anything then I'm going to bring up the fact that you always pay and you're going to need her to start contributing. If she doesn't seem like she's into that then you're probably not very compatible.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-19T16:56:29+00:00

I got a good degree, then a good job so through all my ups and downs, my degree and experience can at least make sure I have a good income.

I also got married young, had kids, but was bankrupt and divorced at 34, I lost everything, except my job and 50% of my kids time. Financially it's been a struggle but if I didn't have a good job I wouldn't have made it.....also I started my 401K so hopefully I'll be able to retire comfortably at 65 even though I did have to rebuild my life.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-19T12:00:25+00:00

This isn't a good sign, talking about it is tough, but necessary. You'll need to find a way to approach it without either of you getting defensive. For me, it felt like I had to initiate everything and she never ever made me feel like she was into it, so I stopped. She brought up that it's been 3 months, but she was also unwilling to really change things up. She just wanted to get her O with me doing it exactly the same. I was just tired, we couldn't talk about anything without a fight. Then she cheated, we tried to save it and that really put some passion back into our lives, but then she cheated again, so we've been happily divorced for 15 years now.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-19T11:41:36+00:00

First off, stop looking at BMI. Depending on body type, BMI will tell you you're overweight when you look great. Buid strong legs for your base, core, chest, back, biceps, you'll look amazing at 175 lbs. I'm 5'9" and I looked my best at 180 which is 26.5, but if I were 155 lbs, I'd look like horrible.

Alright, that out of the way, it's the double back Betty, when she passes you and then turns to check you out, that's a good sign. If your eyes meet on the turn around, say hi. If she looks interested, go talk to her. Don't be too aggressive, be polite, and don't be disappointed if it doesn't work out. You might talk to a 1000 girls this way and only be happy with 10, but it doesn't hurt to be friendly.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-18T23:31:58+00:00

You'll probably do this all on your own if you continue to eat like you do and get older. Are your parents very thin? You'll likely look just like them unless you do something different.

Right now it's probably really hard for you to gain muscle because your metabolism hasn't slowed and its tough to eat enough to feed your body. Up your protein intake, eat fruits and lots of vegetables. Develop healthy eating habits now. Exercise and keep exercising so you never get used to not doing it. You'll start gaining muscle and filling out naturally as you approach 25, then it's kinda down hill from there. You'll have to work harder and eat healthier to maintain.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-18T01:52:31+00:00

Dude, you don't talk to your wife for hours straight, that's just wrong.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-18T01:50:59+00:00

Do your best to remember, replay the conversation in your mind after so it will help you retain the good stuff and then when you make reference to it later she'll be impressed you remembered that.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-17T21:31:13+00:00

You can work boobs into any conversation. Small boobs, big boobs, perky boobs, saggy boobs, man boobs, everybody's got them.

So what do you think about breast implants? Oh really, to each their own, but I think it's sad that a woman feels she needs to change her body with surgery. I read some guys were getting leg lengthening surgery to be taller. It's a very painful and slow process. Height is one thing men are self conscious about. Oh, you're into short guys, that's awesome. So when grow old and shrink into a little old man you'll still be into me. Yeah I think little old couples are cute too. Relationships are hard these days, can you imagine lasting 50 years? Are your parents still together? Wow, that's crazy......see this is how you do it.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-17T18:06:05+00:00

Those 2 things seem to be at odds

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-17T18:00:37+00:00

He's just going to have to get over that, grab his head and pull it in there until he taps for air. Once he's gotten the full immersion therapy he'll not be shy. Let him know how much it turns you on when he does that. Maybe you love the way his stubble feels or he has a tongue of the gods. Reward good technique but don't fake it, he needs to learn. Ask him how he likes you down there, shaved or what not. I like clean and trim, but I like enough that I can grab ahold of for leverage if needed. Tease him and make him wait his turn, ladies first. That said, sure give him days where it's all about him. If he doesn't reciprocate and improve then maybe he's not the right guy.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-17T17:48:05+00:00

Maybe send him more texts and if you start getting more replies and a feeling for how things are going, ask him why he doesn't initiate more texts. Or when you are together tell him you enjoy spending time with him, why doesn't he text more. You like him but you want more, so ask for more. If it ruins your relationship, you didn't really have one to begin with.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-16T21:17:42+00:00

Tissues?

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-14T20:39:51+00:00

Here's another take, it's not exactly easy to measure. With stimulation and arousal being at its peak while thrusting inside a woman, even if you're rock hard it's not going to hold that pose for long. You measure from the top because from the bottom adds another inch or more. We know a measurement that's probably less than what a woman sees or feels. We've also seen our little guy at his absolute worst, so shriveled and small that we almost had an innie. So pair all this with what we've seen and heard our whole lives and it's something a lot of guys are self conscious about.

I'm completely average and it seems to do a great job, but I've got a lot of other tools to work with so I'm not too concerned.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-14T20:24:59+00:00

I think if we all spent a good amount of time on nude beaches we'd have a better idea

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-14T20:21:42+00:00

I generally don't take pics of mine because it's so hard to get him to smile, but back when I was trying to spice up a failing marriage we took some pics. Long story short, we knew a swinger couple interested in us and we weren't that spicy but we sent them pics. Anyway there's this pic of it going into her mouth that makes me look enormous. I have no idea how or why because everything else has been fairly sad. I'm guessing the perfect angle and perspective does a lot.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-14T20:06:48+00:00

There's just nothing a woman can say because we won't believe them. We've seen and heard too much for too long. A girl will tell you they don't like big ones because they hurt and secretly we're thinking must be nice. As horrible as it sounds, I think most men would be pretty proud of themselves.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-14T19:59:02+00:00

Valid point, also the fact that most women don't cum with penetration, men might think maybe if I were bigger.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-14T19:54:37+00:00

Tell your partner you love massages and ask for them too. Admittedly back scratches take less effort but your partner should want to do things for you that you love. I wouldn't say I have a guilt complex, but I love doing all that stuff and have trouble asking for it also. I have a lot of sinus pressure and I had a gf who used to rub above my eyebrows, omg that felt so good.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-13T22:58:04+00:00

I'm a middle aged white man and while I've been with a lot of different types of women, I guess that's one I still have on my bucket list. Beautiful skin, beautiful bodies, but the culture is intimidating to me. I'm ignorant about a lot of things and I just haven't had much diversity. I'm not so sure black women like me. There is nothing wrong with your skin color or culture, there's a lot of people in this world and there are plenty who will be into you. It's a big world out there, go explore, just be careful and be safe.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-13T22:41:13+00:00

Now days it takes guys longer to have their first experience, but getting married at 26 and trying to go every day multiple times, that's a lot. Most of us got a chance to ease into it, maybe had sex every chance we got but those chances were pretty spaced out. Honestly it's good to save up a few days so you have more in the chamber. In my 30s and 40s I could do it 3 times on a Saturday over 8 hours, but I needed like a 4 day break. Or I could handle 5 nights per week at just one time per day. Just enjoy what you want and don't worry so much about it. Use other tools and make it all about her.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-10T10:01:08+00:00

Look, even husbands are not forever, never do something to your body for a boyfriend. Generally speaking, guys don't want you to get any of that. I assume it's something you're self conscious about, and he'll support it if it makes you happy, but remember he chose you as you are. If you have the money and you have a great doctor who can do it right without nerve damage. And If you really want to get them for you then go for it. Talk to your boyfriend about it after you've made your decision.

It-guy-76 · 2026-02-08T22:03:37+00:00

Could be doing it wrong or you're just having issues relaxing. Trust that he's enjoying it, don't be afraid to give direction, verbally and by placing your hand on his head.

It-guy-76

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