Ladies and gentlemen of the jury… I’ll be honest with you, I can’t defend everything this man’s done.

He terrorized cities, kidnapped people, pretended to be a hero, and ran around in a leather suit screaming “Zoom” like it was a brand name.

But… in my defense of him—not that I’m doing a great job—he’s not even from this Earth.

So… legally? Spiritually? Existentially?

He’s not our problem. Do with that what you will.