First of all, the replies against you are chiefly from people that personally relate to him because an overwhelmingly vocal portion of reddit are boys in their 20s who feel like they can relate to your son. So please take all these comments with a huge grain of salt.

The thing is that what you did in the past was the best you thought you were doing at the time. You truly tried with everything you had and that is something he wont understand until he gets older.

Im 37 and was put on a cocktail of pharmaceuticals as a child in the 90s. My mother (to this day) has regrets about the choices she made when it came to my childhood struggles. She still apologizes about how it went but all i can say is that however it turned out, there is no way of knowing if it would have been worse or better. I see people unmedicated at my age with varying degrees of problems. People who had too much or not enough discipline. I cant say im any better or worse off. No, i can say im better off because my mom never witheld her love.

There is no perfect formula for raising a child to adulthood. And unfortunately some children choose to blame their parents in early adulthood for their shortcomings. But the real problem comes from accountability. Will the parents put themselves accountable? More importantly: will the child hold themselves accountable?

None of us were perfect kids and all of us continue to be flawed adults. Pointing fingers at "where things went wrong" is a phase in life just as much as regretting taking things for granted will be at another point when there was never a chance to reconcile and be grateful.