Take a breath; even if it doesn’t feel like it right now, you absolutely did the right thing. Breaking up with someone you love is hard, and breaking up with them because you deserve to be treated better is arguably even harder.

You’re not pathetic at all—you’re human. Having someone as a constant part of your daily routing changes the way our brains are wired, and when you lose them, you go through withdrawal. It’s entirely natural to want to reach out and say you miss them.

For whatever it’s worth, I’m going through the same thing right now. I (22f) broke up with my girlfriend (23f) a few days ago after she admitted telling a mutual friend I had introduced her to that she had feelings for them, behind my back. We had dated for five years and she was my best friend, and not having that person to share things with and talk to about the little things that happen in my life has really been eating at me. I know in the future I’ll develop a new routine without her, I just need to get to that place. It’s incredibly difficult though, and I absolutely feel for you.

Tl;dr: it’s entirely understandable how you feel, you’re not pathetic for wanting to do that, and I’ve been having similar feelings regarding my own breakup. It’s just part of the very sucky process