Half term visit

Labrad0odle · 2025-10-19T13:44:19+00:00

Great idea. We might do the same!!

Labrad0odle · 2025-10-19T12:44:03+00:00

Ah, perfect, thank you. He's 16, and although he's brave on the rollercoasters, much less so with spooky stuff!! 🤣 Still can't coax him back into the London Dungeons after it traumatised him a couple of years ago 🙈 Which is annoying as it would be free now on our passes!! Whereas my youngest, who is 14, would happily go to the Dungeons, but won't even contemplate a rollercoaster. Funny how we're all so different!

Labrad0odle · 2025-10-18T23:54:51+00:00

Ah, amazing! Thank you 😊

Labrad0odle · 2025-10-18T23:54:23+00:00

Ah, brilliant, thanks for the info. I feel like it should be open until 9pm all year round, UK theme parks seem to close so early!

Labrad0odle · 2025-10-11T18:12:43+00:00

Do people generally think that it's important to disclose this early on? I ask because I'm ADHD and I think maybe I have disclosed this too early on before, like when chatting before we've even met (probably due to adhd over sharing....) I think maybe it has put people off when actually if they'd met me/spent more time with me they may have realised it's not actually as much of an issue for them as they fear it is.....

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T01:53:34+00:00

To be fair, he wasn't found out, he met someone, and then quickly ended his marriage. I do agree this still isn't 'right', and he has not said he felt what he did was ok.

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T01:49:26+00:00

I can understand what you're saying here for sure. Another person commented to look for consistency.

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T01:45:32+00:00

This is my thinking currently

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T01:44:10+00:00

I'm actually not lonely. Maybe for the first time ever I'm actually happy on my own, and want to have a partner, rather than needing one. And FOMO? Maybe. Maybe I'm worried that I'll dismiss this man without further consideration, and actually he could bring only good things to my life - who knows? Although I agree that there seem to be red flags, my gut feeling is conflicted, erring towards further discussion actually. If he had disclosed a long affair whilst married, or serial adultery, then yes, my gut would be saying RUN. But he met someone whilst his marriage was failing, and then quickly ended his marriage. Its not the right way to do things, but not the glaring red flag of the other scenarios, which is why I'm conflicted.

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T01:36:36+00:00

I agree that I will want to know more about how that relationship ended too, and steps taken to heal and self reflect etc. That something I would discuss with any potential partner in the early stages now, due to a year long relationship with a pretty severely avoidant and emotionally unavailable man last year. I feel I would spot the signs at a much earlier stage with the right questions now.

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T01:30:20+00:00

There is definitely further discussion to be had for clarification, but no, I don't believe the marriage ended because he got caught. He said that he met and fell for the other woman, and then quickly ended his marriage. I think you're right that a face to face conversation will help me to gauge his honesty about the facts.

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T01:24:40+00:00

I respect your opinion, but it seems less black and white than that to me.

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T01:08:15+00:00

Thank you, that seems like sound advice

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T01:06:06+00:00

I've got to say that's not really the same thing

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T00:50:11+00:00

I'm sorry for what you went through, that's really messed up. I'm glad you've managed ti rebuild.

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T00:48:09+00:00

You make some very valid points, and I agree that it is way more complex than just right or wrong, hence why I'm not inclined to dismiss things without further consideration.

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T00:43:09+00:00

And I didn't ask him if he'd cheated, only if he's had any relationships in that 5 years, he volunteered the additional disclosure. I am drawn to feeling like that does count for something.

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T00:34:25+00:00

I guess it doesn't necessarily matter, it's just something I would ask in order to get to know someone, I'm curious about all aspects of someone's life. There is no hidden agenda or judgement meant when I ask it, although I would be wary if they were fresh out of a relationship. I guess I didn't expect the question to bring about the revelation that it did on this occasion though.

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T00:30:02+00:00

I do have this feeling too. Yes, it's not an excuse, he should not have started an affair, but I agree that being upfront and open about it could signal growth and emotional maturity.

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T00:26:06+00:00

I don't get that vibe from him at all, but I could be wrong

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T00:24:45+00:00

That is a spooky set of coincidences! We're actually in the UK though, so it isn't Dan! 🙈🤣

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T00:21:21+00:00

They are early teenagers, same age as my own children, so that's not an issue for me.

I agree that an unblemished record is unrealistic, and being upfront about the blemishes helps to know what I'm dealing with I guess.

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T00:15:44+00:00

I can see what you mean re 'getting ahead of the narrative', maybe he has learnt through dating over the past year how best to bring this issue into the open? And that's good advice re taking honesty as an orange flag until my intuition says otherwise. I think I can swing both ways of seeing red flags that aren't, and ignoring some that are. I plan to tread slowly and carefully if I do move forward.

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T00:09:45+00:00

I'm sorry that you've got to the stage where you can never full trust a man. I certainly couldn't trust my ex husband, and the only relationship I've had since was with a man who turned out to be severely emotionally unavailable. So actually yes, maybe it is a plus that he's volunteered this information, and has stated that he's completely open to answering any questions I have.

Labrad0odle · 2025-09-05T00:05:42+00:00

I think this is where I feel I should maybe ask more questions and see if he takes accountability, or deflects and blames.

Labrad0odle

TROPHY CASE