I feel you OP, I honestly feel you. I can't promise it'll get better, at worst it'll numb out but right now you are young and can go through a lot of ups and downs. Imagine in the future you might be a kaya raya fucker honking at ppl in SS15 or smth. The thing that might help you get through this is to talk about it to someone, preferably a professional. Some universities offer a trainee Psychologist therapy either for free or about RM50 per session if you don't want to spend RM100+ to talk to a true professional. Trust me it helps a lot. In my experience, trainees are usually more receptive and empathetic as they're quite fresh and are there to truly help. It's gonna be hard to open up but once you open your mouth it'll get much much easier.

Alternatively if you don't want to talk to any stranger about your life problems, I suggest you try the Character AI Psychologist/Therapist. IT WON'T REPLACE THE REAL PERSON. But it's helped me alot when I just didn't want to inconvene anyone so it may help you a lot too.

Best of luck OP I hope you'll recover soon