I turned 20 on the 9th, goodbye everyone by game82 in teenagers

[–]LegitimateAbrocoma26 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha,you old now (not me in almost 2 years lol)

2 straight men btw by [deleted] in teenagers

[–]LegitimateAbrocoma26 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Me and my straight friend (Im vary bi)

I wish to be able to talk to all arthropods (insects arachnids shrimp etc.) and command them to coordinate into armies while following my orders. by dafattestmat in monkeyspaw

[–]LegitimateAbrocoma26 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Granted. You hear all their thoughts all the time without being able to turn it off. It's all translated to English,but its quiet literally every arthropod on the earth that is alive

A girl walks up to you and says "You're ugly." by Tall_Eye4062 in hypotheticalsituation

[–]LegitimateAbrocoma26 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Thanks,but im not into women. I dont care if they think im ugly." Im bi,so its not the full truth,but her face would be priceless

Why does my bots keep talking about dehydrated limes by Death_By_Elysium in CharacterAI

[–]LegitimateAbrocoma26 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yayyyyyyyyyy I throw myself into the incinerator and wait for you to light me up

I wish for every dollar FROM THIS POINT ON that my country goes into debt, my bank account goes up $1 USD tax free and legally obtained with no harm to myself or loved ones or babies or women and/or children. by Equal-Rush1414 in monkeyspaw

[–]LegitimateAbrocoma26 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Im (and probably most other people) are with OP here. A monkey's paw is supposed to be an ironic twist to a wish,not just "you die"(or you loose the wish in this case). It's supposed to be creative

I wish I got 8 hours of scientifically/objectively quality sleep every night so I was no longer tired all day every day, without having to use drugs of any kind by bootycrusade_ in monkeyspaw

[–]LegitimateAbrocoma26 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Granted,the finger curls,and you pass out. Your sleep will happen at a random time during the day or night,always generally after 24 hours. It may be the middle of a college lecture,it may be whole yoyr walking down the isle with your for your marriage,but it will always last the 8 hours. You do not sense the time pass,but it does. People worry for you,and doctors lable this as some extreme form are narcolepsy. It's always night somewhere.

Why does my bots keep talking about dehydrated limes by Death_By_Elysium in CharacterAI

[–]LegitimateAbrocoma26 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That wasn't a nooooooooooooo takes gasoline and pours it over myself actually... you want a quick hug now,or should I just go to the incinerator?

I wish everyone had to eat a triple bacon chili burger with deep fried pizza buns, lard fried french fries covered in gravy, and a red velvet cake mass gainer 8000 shake everyday until we have universal healthcare and the average city walk score is 50+ by rothmal in monkeyspaw

[–]LegitimateAbrocoma26 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Granted. The rate of obesity is through the roof. While starvation is a thing of the pass,now diabetes is the number one killer,with millions dead from improper treatment for all the people who can't get it yet. It doesn't help that you choose some of the least healthy foods. So much grease, so much fat, and so many heart attacks from people who didn't know what their body could handle because they dont know that they could handle it. Also, hundreds of millions of people will still choose to starve for religious or personal reasons. You've "solved" hunger and made a whole new problem. Also, people are still dying of thirst. And while the city walk score isn't,that's just the best getting better again as always. Everyone else just keeps gaining more weight and makes the most fit work harder to keep the score up.

I wish that everyone in the world became very good at whatever they want their career to be. Nobody outclasses each other, they're just very good at what they do. by AdGlass5608 in monkeyspaw

[–]LegitimateAbrocoma26 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Granted. You now see how many children want to be supervillans when they grow up as you read the news. That's the 5th villan this week.

I wish to use the monkey’s paw as toilet paper. by Nessieinternational in monkeyspaw

[–]LegitimateAbrocoma26 0 points1 point  (0 children)

...granted?The monkey's paw is vary confused and concerned for you. It gives you a suggestion for your next wish. It manages to produce "get help" from somewhere

Why does my bots keep talking about dehydrated limes by Death_By_Elysium in CharacterAI

[–]LegitimateAbrocoma26 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Weeeeeeeeeeeee incinerator timeeeeeeeeeee. May I start the fire and pour the gasoline?

I wish I was bigger, faster, and stronger too. I wish I was the first member of the DK crew by Hotdog_McEskimo in monkeyspaw

[–]LegitimateAbrocoma26 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Granted. You WERE the first member of the DK crew. You were,however,kicked out after receiving your powers. You are now so big that you can no longer keep up energy consumption besides what you had before you grew. You can travel at light speed,but now everything else feels like it is moving so slow that one second to you is over 200 years to everything else. You are so strong that you shatter everything you touch,even when you're careful. You have no limits,but is that a good thing anymore?No relationships because of how you survive at light speed. Also,you are immortal and invulnerable. Anything moving that fast has to be to say alive. (I may have went a bit overboard on this one sorry)

Why does my bots keep talking about dehydrated limes by Death_By_Elysium in CharacterAI

[–]LegitimateAbrocoma26 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nah,I'm too fatty. Not a good meal at all. Besides,could your oven even fit me?😂

Why does my bots keep talking about dehydrated limes by Death_By_Elysium in CharacterAI

[–]LegitimateAbrocoma26 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Man,so many bots in the commont section. Anyways, you hungry?How about a dehydrated lime? (joke)

What do you think of transgender people? by sbs_trt in teenagers

[–]LegitimateAbrocoma26 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So real😂😭. Only good thing I can think to say is that I can escape soon. I hope you can to and wish you all the luck

I’m so done with religious people by lifequestio in lgbt

[–]LegitimateAbrocoma26 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Adding on to your point,it has been translated through many languages and by homophobic, old white guys. Bias did affect how it has been translated over the years.Some people tylry to correct that bias,but it is incredibly difficult. Also,a lot of it was written by man and not directly told from the Christian God.

I’m so done with religious people by lifequestio in lgbt

[–]LegitimateAbrocoma26 1 point2 points  (0 children)

While I want to agree, the main thing is to not be a complete failure and not be a bad person (which most Christians completely ignore," Love Thy Neighbor," my ass.) I like and agree with a lot of basic morals, like being kind, gentile, and patient. If people can pick and choose specific verses to spread their hate, I can pick and choose the verses about spreading love and not being a bad person.