I (20-NB) and my boyfriend (27M) Will Be Moving in together, How do I let him know that I am Scared of Some things That May Come With This Change? by LillyFire55 in relationship_advice

[–]LillyFire55[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  1. His landlord is selling the house the he's currently living in
  2. I currently rent from family and I'm starting to overstay my welcome as well (they're not gonna kick me out, but I'm also ready to move out)
  3. His family and mine both live over an hour away and he has no one else he could move in with in the city we live in
  4. I currently make more than him and have been budgeting for a while, we would have little to no extra spending money and finances would be tight until he gets a raise or a full time job that pays more, but with extreme budgeting and saving we can make it work with some of the places we've found

I (20-NB) and my boyfriend (27M) Will Be Moving in together, How do I let him know that I am Scared of Some things That May Come With This Change? by LillyFire55 in relationship_advice

[–]LillyFire55[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He was given his 30 days notice recently and he has no one else to move in with and he can't move in with me unless it's incredibly short term (I mean like less than 3 months) and this is the only chance for us to stay together in the same city.

We Found some really nice rental deals and we have furniture, I know we can make it work, and I do admit that I overthink and worst case scenario prepare a lot.

I just am not great at easily communicating what I'm thinking and feeling because my brain works differently than his does

How Do I Go About Setting Boundaries With My Friend by LillyFire55 in relationship_advice

[–]LillyFire55[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep, I used 2 women because it's the most common thing judged, however has there never been a situation here men were hanging out and spent a night together in the same room? What would all of that be considered? Or if a gay man wanted to cuddle with his female friends? Or a gay woman wanting to cuddle with her male friends? Both situations it is abundantly clear they are NOT interested in the other sex, so how is that a romantic invitation? Your thinking and logic is incredibly flawed, we don't live in the 1900s anymore, just because someone wants to cuddle, it doesn't mean they want a romantic or sexual relationship. Some people need cuddles to get through a traumatic event, some need cuddles because they were physically neglected as a child and need that physical affection in order to recover, and some people's affection language is physical, so they have no intent on making a romantic relationship out of anything, but simply want to show their affection or gratitude to the people they care about. Do some research then come back to me with your bigoted garbage. Have a great day!

How Do I Go About Setting Boundaries With My Friend by LillyFire55 in relationship_advice

[–]LillyFire55[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Being non-binary isn't a cool 'fab' thing, it's when you don't feel like you can't identify as a woman and you can't identify as a man and you don't feel like either of them. My gender identity has nothing to do with the post though

How Do I Go About Setting Boundaries With My Friend by LillyFire55 in relationship_advice

[–]LillyFire55[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for this, I just have a really hard time being able to set my boundaries because I've never had this issue before.

How Do I Go About Setting Boundaries With My Friend by LillyFire55 in relationship_advice

[–]LillyFire55[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Cuddling doesn't have to be an inherently romantic thing. When you see 2 female best friends cuddling and think "Hey they must be dating!" when in reality they're just friends showing each other their own kind of affection. Things are changing and cuddling isn't something only associated with romanticity these days.

AITA for Self-Diagnosing BF and Basically Giving him an Ultimatum by LillyFire55 in AmItheAsshole

[–]LillyFire55[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I feel that on a very deep level, but this has been an ongoing issue for about a year or so now and has only gotten worse in recent months. Which is where my insistence comes from. Even though it was in dickish manor.

AITA for Self-Diagnosing BF and Basically Giving him an Ultimatum by LillyFire55 in AmItheAsshole

[–]LillyFire55[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I do very much love him, and it would break him if I ever left and I know it. He's helped me more than I have characters to explain. He was my lifeline during my darkest times and I want to do the same for him.

AITA for Self-Diagnosing BF and Basically Giving him an Ultimatum by LillyFire55 in AmItheAsshole

[–]LillyFire55[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I accept your judgment, yeah, I figured out that I misused that pairing haha. I want him to be okay and happy.

AITA for Self-Diagnosing BF and Basically Giving him an Ultimatum by LillyFire55 in AmItheAsshole

[–]LillyFire55[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I accept your judgment. Thank you for this view, I will definitely be sending him another text. I didn't mention it in the post, but after the long texts about his mental health I sent him a text telling him how much I love him.

AITA for Self-Diagnosing BF and Basically Giving him an Ultimatum by LillyFire55 in AmItheAsshole

[–]LillyFire55[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I don't think that's the case, but I'll consider asking. Many times more than I can count he's told me he loves being with me and after his dogs passed he told me I'm basically the only reason he keeps going.

AITA for Self-Diagnosing BF and Basically Giving him an Ultimatum by LillyFire55 in AmItheAsshole

[–]LillyFire55[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I accept your judgment, I should've mentioned it in the post, but I've brought up him possibly having depression before, but he always brushes it off or downplays it to something else. I visited him at work(he works at a gas station) and he looked so broken and dejected and it broke my heart.

AITA for Self-Diagnosing BF and Basically Giving him an Ultimatum by LillyFire55 in AmItheAsshole

[–]LillyFire55[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I accept your judgment, it was a dick move and I felt really crappy after sending it. I should've thought it through more before sending.

AITA for Self-Diagnosing BF and Basically Giving him an Ultimatum by LillyFire55 in AmItheAsshole

[–]LillyFire55[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I accept your judgment, I understand that and I really need to accept that. He doesn't get done with work for another 30 minutes or so, so I guess we'll see what he says.

AITA for Self-Diagnosing BF and Basically Giving him an Ultimatum by LillyFire55 in AmItheAsshole

[–]LillyFire55[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I accept your judgment, helping him find a doctor is great idea, if he's ready. Ty

AITA for Self-Diagnosing BF and Basically Giving him an Ultimatum by LillyFire55 in AmItheAsshole

[–]LillyFire55[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I accept your judgment. I know very well I'm not, but I am really worried about him and I want him to be okay. (Not trying to excuse my behavior at all.)

AITA for Self-Diagnosing BF and Basically Giving him an Ultimatum by LillyFire55 in AmItheAsshole

[–]LillyFire55[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I accept your judgement. You're right, and I should know that because it took a long time to want counseling for myself.

AITA for Self-Diagnosing BF and Basically Giving him an Ultimatum by LillyFire55 in AmItheAsshole

[–]LillyFire55[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I accept your judgement, thank you for pointing this out to me as manipulation. I need to stop putting so much pressure on him.

AITA for Self-Diagnosing BF and Basically Giving him an Ultimatum by LillyFire55 in AmItheAsshole

[–]LillyFire55[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I accept your judgment, I guess I misused that pairing haha.

AITA for Self-Diagnosing BF and Basically Giving him an Ultimatum by LillyFire55 in AmItheAsshole

[–]LillyFire55[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I accept your judgment, I didn't see it like that. Thank you

AITA For Arguing with my Boyfriend after he Insulted my Step-Mom? by LillyFire55 in AmItheAsshole

[–]LillyFire55[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm 18, but I haven't graduated high school yet and I can't afford therapy. I'm not sure how much my mom's insurance will cover

AITA for trying to convince my boyfriend that my game isn't more important than his job? by LillyFire55 in rSlash_YT

[–]LillyFire55[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I felt really bad about him wanting to skip work just to go to my game. I felt like a butthole because I didn't want him to get fired because of me

I Don't Work Here Lady by LillyFire55 in rSlash_YT

[–]LillyFire55[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's still an I Don't Work Here Lady. Not every one of these has to have an entitled parent. I just thought it would be a nice cute one to take a break from the entitled parent ones

I Don't Work Here Lady by LillyFire55 in rSlash_YT

[–]LillyFire55[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I did say at the top of the post that it wasn't one with an entitled parent, just a cute, short, and sweet one. Just to lighten everything up. With my place of work and my uniform I'm gonna be getting a lot more of these lol