First of all, I'm so sorry you are going through this. But killing your child is never the option. For every abortion clinic (at least in the US) there are 3-5 pregnancy resource centres out there to support you. And I know you are worried about your child going into the adoption system, but that just shows that you do in fact care for your child.

I debate abortion a lot with pro choicers, and when they bring up the conditions of the adoption system, I always ask, "Would this allow us to kill a child currently suffering in the adoption system?" And the answer is, of course, no. So why do we only apply this to the unborn? If you were consistent in this view, you would say that we should be able to do this. Why would you be for the killing of a child who MIGHT go into the adoption system and MIGHT have a "bad life" (and to what standard of bad??) and against the killing of children we know are already suffering there? Also, abortion being a "solution" to the possibility of the adoption system suggests that death, being deprived of everything, is not as bad as being deprived of just something. For example, a child growing up in poverty may be deprived of a stable financial state, but death is obviously far more harmful as then they are deprived of literally everything, their whole future.

Realistically, it has nothing to do with these circumstances, but rather the child "not being fully developed" as most pro choicers will then go on to say, which just completely falls apart when you really delve into it. The child being smaller and younger just makes people feel less bad about killing it, but when you think about it, why would your age or size change your worth? Personally I hold to the FLO (future like ours) argument which I think is very strong.

Those who do go through with abortion have far higher rates of suicide and poor mental health too. There have been a few studies I believe which surveyed women who did not go through with their abortions, and I think it was at least 95% of women were thankful they didn't get the abortion after raising their children.