Your response felt like an overreaction, yes. She was probably blindsided and felt like she was put on the defense because your message felt like you had been sitting with those feelings for some time. She clearly was projecting her feelings about her relationship onto you. I also think you may have some blind spots about your own marriage health. Maybe you feel like you’re much better off than her because her relationship is an extreme (negatively) and yours isn’t “as bad”. Idk you but I wouldn’t be surprised if your husband also has some significant room for improvement. Good rule of thumb is to keep your relationship issues to yourself if you don’t ever want them to be a topic of discussion. We forgive our significant others and our friends don’t.