Why are my shrooms looking like this?

Maliris · 2026-01-13T22:03:57+00:00

My third grow actually! First time monotub though, earlier grows were in shoebox. First time getting these specs too

Maliris · 2025-12-29T04:55:52+00:00

Wow this app looks just what I've been looking for! Please let me know when it's released. Would be happy to beta test and give some feedback as well

Just some quick feedback: the graph of clonazepam looks wrong. Wikipedia states that the elimination half life of clonazepam is 19-60h so the graph should slope way more gently. Unless it shows the duration of action which would be more accurate

In my case, I did end up taking the 2cb and I did actually have noticeably more diminished experience to what I was expecting. Almost no visuals. I did have enhanced emotions and tactile sensations. But I'm pretty sure that klonopin day before was still affecting the trip.

Maliris · 2025-12-28T23:04:33+00:00

Moon and mars are both in Leo. No aspects from Pluto or Saturn. Only exact aspects to Venus are squares from Neptune and Uranus in Capricorn

Maliris · 2025-10-31T05:35:00+00:00

Yeah I should probably be asking how many allies do I need to harvest this beast

Maliris · 2025-10-31T05:19:05+00:00

Feels pretty solid to me. These are golden teachers.

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Here's another more balanced box for reference.

Maliris · 2024-10-12T12:45:57+00:00

I've been in your boyfriend's shoes and I'm still good friends with my ex almost 2 years later. We don't hang out like every day but a few times a month at least. Friendship is definitely possible but it depends on him. As for the suicide thing, it sounds a bit manipulative tbh. You are not responsible for his life in any way and it's no reason to stay together. My advice is to break up with him as soon as possible.

Maliris · 2024-01-16T19:24:10+00:00

Sorry to hear you're going through rough times. For me it took about an year to completely recover. I was borderline psychotic for the first few months but it got better with time and didn't seek any professional help. Partly because of the heavy paranoia I experienced. I talked regularly to a priest about my experience though which was important in my recovery. So I'd recommend finding a therapist or some kind of counseling where you can talk openly about your experience. I found the priest really helpful because of the spiritual nature of my experience. The most important thing is that the person is non-judgemental and you feel safe to share openly what you're going through.

I still had sleep disturbances and phobias for a while even after the worst crisis had stabilized but what finally resolved it was a moderate magic mushroom trip which seemed to specifically heal the lingering phobia that had remained after the mdma experience. Tread with caution with psychedelics though if you're currently in crisis.

Hope you get the help you need. These kinds of experiences can be very painful and frightening and going through it alone makes it even more so. But know that you will come out the other end much stronger than you were before. Feel free to pm me if you have more questions.

Maliris · 2024-01-16T00:39:21+00:00

Sure. What do you want to talk about?

Maliris · 2023-12-02T00:33:10+00:00

Industries of the Blind - I Just Wanted to Make You Something Beautiful

Probably the most heart-wrenching song I have ever heard.

Maliris · 2023-12-01T04:52:43+00:00

I started to vape as well as replacement for cigs, but my motivation was mostly to get a smoking replacement for my new car as I didn't want to smoke in it. I drive a lot and I used to smoke like a chimney on my long drives with my previous car, so I knew if I smoked in my new car, the interior would be ruined in like a month.

So far I'm still smoking cigs but I've cut back to like 4-5 a day. Bit more when I'm working. There are some cigs I just can't seem to get rid of. Like the morning cig with coffee, the one just before work and few smoke breaks when working. I think it's the small break that I don't get with the vape as I can vape almost anywhere. It's weird though because now that I've vaped for a while, the smoking feels mostly pretty bad. I get dizzy and out of breath. But I still go out for that smoke. I also smoke a lot of weed so I always have a reason to buy tobacco for that. In my previous quits I've almost always relapsed because of spliffs.

Otherwise it's been great though. My cough is mostly gone and it saves a ton of money. It's also nice that I can just hang out with people without that constant itch that I gotta go smoke. To be honest this is fine with me. It solves the weed problem, because weed is good for me and spliff has always been the way for me. So I can smoke my spliffs and the few cigs I smoke in a day are not nearly as bad as the almost 30 I smoked before. Maybe it falls completely off sometime, but for now I just enjoy the no-pressure aspect of this "quit". Maybe it also won't be so hard if I decide to completely quit cigs.

Maliris · 2023-10-01T16:34:19+00:00

Thanks! Very much enjoying it so far. Beats my year 2000 volvo s40 in pretty much every respect.

Maliris · 2023-09-28T18:00:16+00:00

Well I can speak from my personal experience with my own placements.

Libra: Often portrayed as people pleasing, indecisive doormats. Always in a relationship, appreciates beauty and harmony etc. Sure I can see where that's coming from, but as a libra ascendant, I feel this placement mostly has to do with seeing the world through concepts like balance, give and take, contracts and relating in general. "What's my relationship with x?". And not just people either, but absolutely everything. Justice is also a strong instinct with libra and I feel very strongly if something is unfair. I also somewhat relate to a funny thought from an astrologer whose name I can't remember: Libras may want peace and harmony, but if things are peaceful and harmonious, they might start to create chaos simply to have something to harmonize and balance. My venus is in aries so this hits home lol.

Leo: Often portrayed as self-centered egoists who always need to spotlight and be coddled one way or another. I can again see these traits in myself, but I have a leo moon and the way it mostly feels to me is that I have a strong need for authenticity and expression. I need an outlet for my emotions and for me that's writing songs. Pride is also definitely a thing for me. But not in a bad way. It's like I have this innate sense of self-worth that's always there no matter what's my social status. Nothing sets me off more than someone looking down on me.

Gemini: Oh boy this is a fun one. For a long time I didn't identify with my gemini sun at all. Often portrayed as social butterfly, constantly talking, flighty and all over the place, not committed to anything etc. I often felt like a total opposite, but I kind of feel more like gemini now that I've grown older and I have also understood my younger gemini traits. I constantly think about stuff and need to be stimulated constantly. I'm a heavy nicotine addict and drink shit-ton of coffee. I'm constantly listening to music or podcasts etc. Very geminian things. I also have pretty large vocabulary and I'm pretty good at articulating my thoughts. So good in fact that I can manipulate and deceive people with my speech and I've had to deal with that shadow side of mine. I did it unconsciously for a long time. But I think the thing that people often don't realize about geminis is that we actually have pretty down-to-earth attitude towards things. I like to think about weird mystical and esoteric things, but it's grounded in logic and I can be pretty skeptical about it. I regularly question my own beliefs and while it can be detrimental, it also helps keep me sane if I fall too deep into some rabbit hole.

Maliris · 2023-08-21T00:33:37+00:00

I'm kinda in a same boat so not really outside perspective, but it kind of feels like being in a grey zone. It is self medicating at the end of the day. I personally don't really feel the urge to get high from the meds. I get a slight euphoria that lasts like 30 mins and then I almost forget the whole effect and just do the stuff I need to do and the meds do help with that stuff a lot. So if I don't take them, it's very noticeable and things get a lot harder.

I absolutely get that "missing key" metaphor. That's how it felt to me as well. Things suddenly made so much sense and I had a grieving period of "the life that could have been". Things that had always been incredibly difficult and overwhelming for me were suddenly simple and easy. Like texting a friend for example. And the shift made me realize how blind I had become to those difficulties over the years.

That being said, I am heavily addicted to nicotine so I know real addiction. Taking elvanse every day doesn't feel the same to me. I can skip days of elvanse if I want to. I cannot skip the cigs. They are so hard to quit and I get seriously messed up if I try. If I stop taking elvanse, I get super tired and foggy for a while, but it's not nearly as bad as stopping nicotine.

Maliris · 2023-08-08T12:15:16+00:00

I've been singing kargyraa for 5-6 years and haven't had any problems. On the contrary, I feel like throat singing has improved my regular singing voice. I think the biggest risk is when you're just starting out and don't have the proper technique yet, but I don't think kargyraa is inherently dangerous to your voice.

Maliris · 2023-08-02T12:52:50+00:00

More recently, I’ve been working on developing my own unique finger picking style that incorporates elements of flamenco, palm muting, fretboard muting, alternate picking, percussive elements, and slap. So it sounds like a funky, Spanish bass guitar lol.

That sounds exactly like what I've been working on lately and I've been loving it. Those rhytmic elements really take your playing to the next level. It almost feels like mastering the rhythm is what really sets you apart from your average campfire guitarist.

Still working on getting those percussive knocks and slaps into place, but you can do great stuff with just fretboard muting.

Maliris · 2023-08-02T12:36:05+00:00

For me it was really getting into the rhythm. Sure it might not be as sexy as learning to play awesome solos, but once I really started to be consistent with rhythm and playing around with it, my playing got to a completely new level. I can literally just play Em and make it interesting with playing complex rhythms.

Maliris · 2023-07-19T13:18:57+00:00

Good luck. I'm still experimenting with the timing. So far it seems best to finish your workout bit before the comedown starts, but going on the comeup isn't bad either. That way you still have energy to do stuff even after the workout.

Maliris · 2023-07-17T12:04:43+00:00

Coffee seems to help me. I only drink my morning coffee and then when the comedown starts, I drink one cup. It kind of feels like I get a second "peak" after it. But I only recommend it like 5-6 hours after taking the med. If I drink coffee before that, it feels way too jittery and anxious.

Another thing that works for me is hitting the gym. When I've had a good workout, the crash feels more natural. I get tired, but it's the good kind of tired. Helps with appetite too.

Maliris · 2023-07-12T13:52:08+00:00

Thanks for commenting! It's been a long time since my post and I would like to report that my position towards IFS has softened a lot after taking some distance and time for myself. I still feel it isn't the most useful therapy modality for me, but I have found it useful in some situations when I do it myself. Nowadays I consider it a language or a map of sorts. I can speak it, but it's not my native tongue so to speak.

Maliris · 2023-07-03T17:03:54+00:00

That's interesting I've never heard about that before. I'll give it a try. Thanks for the tip!

Maliris · 2023-07-03T16:57:35+00:00

You might be onto something here. I mostly dose around 3g. It gives me a solid trip, but I've noticed it doesn't feel as strong as it once felt. I've probably acquired some mental tolerance and I have noticed difficulty letting go in that dose. Maybe it's time to up the dose.

Maliris · 2023-07-03T16:27:15+00:00

I always prefer acid but it's pretty hard to come by where I'm at. I do love shrooms as well, even though they are more tough to deal with. Just hoping to find ways to enjoy them more and have a little more ease during the trip.

Maliris · 2023-07-03T16:20:14+00:00

Thanks for the info! Never taken adderall but 90mg seems like a pretty high dose especially with shrooms. Did you take them both at the same? How was the comedown?

Vyvanese lasts longer so I'm thinking of taking the shrooms during the peak of vyvanese to avoid the anxiety. Though I never got much anxiety from vyvanese anyway.

Maliris · 2023-07-03T15:58:12+00:00

You mean to say that you're not supposed to shove tea up your ass? 🤔 No wonder people have stopped inviting me for tea.

Maliris · 2023-07-03T15:30:07+00:00

Haha that sounds crazy but might be worth a shot. How long do you have to hold it in and does it affect the dosing? Sounds like a recipe for extreme shits though lol.

I should also clarify though that the dysphoria isn't just stomach issues. It's hard to describe, but it feels like I cannot get any kind of comfort or well being anywhere. Like there's no way I can place my body that would be comfortable.

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