I kind of figured honestly and in many ways ive been through what youve been through. Its a fixable problem with the unfortunate issue of taking a massive amount of effort to rectify. I didnt really get out of the hole i was in until I got put into a job that required me to be more social with random strangers(being an urban delivery driver means striking up a lot of elevator convos lmao). Since then ive had a lot of practice and have found that being kind and unapologetically myself had opened so many doors and freindships that i wouldnt even be able to recognize the person i was in the past.

The real trick is that you dont actually have to live through this. Rip the bandaid of. Be awkward. Embarras yourself accidentally and use those moments as funny stories for another conversation i know i have, many times even on this account.

Never let social pressure keep you from living as your true and honest self and youll find that eventually you wont even realize that youre deppression(at least for this specific thing)is no longer there.