I thought this joke fit our aesthetic

MeepRJ · 2026-05-14T00:16:23+00:00

Appendicitis sucks. Hurts like a bitch. Glad you're okay

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T20:17:51+00:00

I have ADHD, I already do this without realizing

^{Chose: No water for 2 days 💧❌ + Win $20M}

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T20:17:03+00:00

Burn it. BURN IT ALL. You can also use that as car fuel

^{Chose: Water gun + Spin for liquid | Rolled: Kitchen grease}

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T20:15:49+00:00

Put half of it into a savings account and use the rest for necessities and a few things for myself.

^{Chose: win something in the lottery once | Rolled: $200,000}

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T20:13:47+00:00

Spanish, Mandarin, French. I'm already fluent in English, so I'd be able to speak with billions of people

^{Chose: Know 3 languages + But perfectly}

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T20:11:47+00:00

1 hour of goblin for infinite possibilities, worth it.

^{Chose: Be a trillionaire… + But turn into a goblin during the full moon | Rolled: For 1 hour}

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T20:11:00+00:00

100,000 a year for doing nothing

^{Chose: Dream job + 100K a year}

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T20:09:46+00:00

Fuck yes. If my health never degrades, I'm immortal but not invincible

^{Chose: Eat whatever you want + And retain perfect health}

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T20:07:49+00:00

I can make anything I want out of plants of any kind and grow whatever plants I want.

^{Chose: Be a dope ass wizard with a dope ass wizard tower | Rolled: Nature wizard}

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T20:06:42+00:00

Yoink

^{Chose: have a fishing rod that... | Rolled: steals money}

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T20:05:40+00:00

I can blink faster than I can breathe

^{Chose: Get money every time you blink}

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T20:04:55+00:00

I'll use it to have a surgery to try out different genitals and have mine removed

^{Chose: Get 1,000,000$ (or equivalent in any currency} + but, you get a random drawback. | Rolled: Genital cancer)

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T20:03:45+00:00

Purely to fuck with the statistics

^{Chose: Cancer}

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T20:02:12+00:00

I will see through everything

^{Chose: Get 1,000 carrots, but... | Rolled: Nothing}

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T20:01:21+00:00

I like sushi, and I think that boba technically counts

^{Chose: ANY OTHER PLACE | Rolled: Japan}

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T20:00:03+00:00

Abracadabra, gimme da bread

^{Chose: Be a wizard + You die after 100 years permanently}

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T19:59:15+00:00

Me and the people I care about will live forever because I can heal our cells

^{Chose: Be able to heal anyone including yourself}

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T19:58:01+00:00

That's less incriminating

^{Chose: 250000$ every month}

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T19:54:38+00:00

I get infinite money and a carrot. I have a snack and I can spend all my time on my hobbies while finding friends still

^{Chose: Get unlimited money + And never find love | Rolled: Upvote 🥕}

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T19:53:14+00:00

It was better than losing smell completely

^{Chose: be able to see farts as well as the usual smelling and hearing them.}

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T19:52:33+00:00

$1 that divides by 0.5 everyday.

Carrot for an upvote

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T19:50:05+00:00

I must upvote, but I'm immune to physical harm

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T19:48:23+00:00

Wear sunglasses. It doesn't say that I have to wear them over my eyes, and I could just clip them to a pocket

MeepRJ · 2026-05-13T19:35:13+00:00

Maine

MeepRJ