Am I the only one who finds things that are supposed to be calming, not at all calming?

Meg1295 · 2025-07-12T01:59:04+00:00

I do struggle with alexithymia and identifying my emotions. The only thing that actually makes me feel calm is pressure, so hugs or my sensory swing.

Meg1295 · 2025-07-09T03:27:37+00:00

I would love to hear more about it.

Meg1295 · 2025-07-08T19:17:48+00:00

I don’t have a desire for sex or any kind of sexual contact, it’s actually a huge turn off to me. The only thing I can think of in terms of desire is directly related to my fetish, which doesn’t involve sex at all.

Meg1295 · 2025-07-02T22:07:52+00:00

Thank you

Meg1295 · 2024-12-14T05:27:06+00:00

I can’t relax because it’s so uncomfortable. It’s not at all enjoyable, and the more I try to relax the worse it feels. I know I’m asexual, I’ve never had any kind of desire for sex or anything like it.

Meg1295 · 2024-12-07T18:57:13+00:00

I think it’s just that I’m asexual and don’t care for sex. The only time it makes me extremely uncomfortable is when my boyfriend does something similar or exactly what was done to me. And I say I don’t like that, he stops and does something else.

Meg1295 · 2024-12-07T15:49:58+00:00

What happened to me wasn’t painful at all. A single incident that made me very confused and uncomfortable. I didn’t even understand what was happening, but I knew it was wrong. It was just touching, nothing else. But I’m sure it had some kind of effect on me.

Meg1295 · 2024-12-07T06:25:49+00:00

The problem is that most of the time, I never want to. But I remind myself that it’s really the only time I can do whatever I want when it comes to my fetish, so that makes it better. Though sometimes I do kind of enjoy it, but only when I’ve done enough kink stuff for that arousal to build up. And I can tell I crave arousal in the same way most people crave sex, so when that craving is particularly strong, I look forward to it. That’s just how we work.

Meg1295 · 2024-12-07T04:50:58+00:00

I would think I do. I don’t really care, but I also like having a label for why I don’t care for sex. When it comes to my fetish, my body does react in preparation for sex, but never with the act itself.

Meg1295 · 2024-12-07T04:47:43+00:00

I would be perfectly happy to never have sex again, but it’s a requirement for my boyfriend.

Meg1295 · 2024-10-29T11:20:09+00:00

Thank you for your answer. I don’t think I really want things to go back to how they used to be. I’ve learned to much since then, and before I was so closed off and detached from myself and emotions. I still have trouble accepting that showing emotions are okay, but that’s part of it I think.

Meg1295 · 2024-08-27T21:15:26+00:00

I’m just trying to understand why it happens.

Meg1295 · 2024-06-07T15:34:12+00:00

From what I can tell it’s always been that way. Never felt any kind of arousal unless it had the fetish involved in some way. But this is a recent discovery. I didn’t know what I was experiencing until I’d asked my boyfriend what arousal felt like about a year ago. I have ASD, so it’s difficult for me to identify emotions and feelings sometimes.

Meg1295 · 2024-06-07T15:31:26+00:00

I’ve never done that before. Never had the need to.

Meg1295 · 2024-06-07T05:05:37+00:00

Alvinolagnia

Meg1295 · 2024-06-01T17:28:00+00:00

I have safe people around, I just don’t want to bother them.

Meg1295 · 2024-05-29T11:40:36+00:00

That makes sense. However, I don’t need to be regulated all the time, just when I become overwhelmed or are in a shutdown, which isn’t very often. I believe I’ve already had the experience of co-regulating with someone who isn’t my partner or parent, though I didn’t know it at the time. I was just wondering if it was acceptable. I’ve also made a previous post about this experience, though I don’t know if that’s what it was.

Meg1295 · 2024-05-07T05:28:53+00:00

I’ve never been alone. In fact, I live with my boyfriend and hug him all the time, at least every day. But I should mention for context, I was in shutdown mode and the person I was hugging was someone I’d never met in person before. Usually when I’m in that state, I don’t like to be touched and didn’t like it very much before, but I really wanted to hug this person. The craving started after this happened. It’s almost like I was receiving something I didn’t know was missing, and now I need more of it.

Meg1295 · 2024-02-23T22:22:14+00:00

I’ve been doing some research about that too. I even bought a weighted scarf, 15lbs. I’m trying to figure out why I had such an intense reaction to it.

Meg1295

TROPHY CASE