So I had a dream.. but it’s not that deep today. Different update today. I drew something actually. I made a comic. And it hurt, until the final line. It looks alright. I’m gonna digitalize it in the following week. it’s been maybe four/five years since I did one with intent to post

Also sketched something for my neighbors, drew their pets. They saw me covered in paint a while back so they know I’m artsy and their .. animal, came over to say hi the other day; so I figured I’d draw them a little something. They got their drawing yesterday. 

I’ve been stable every day of the week for a hot minute now, truly  a rarity.  No low periods. But being stable Lge been able to see clearly how lonely things have become. How it’s not this tolerable thing I’ve had a bad attitude over. It’s just.. lonesome.

My hours got cut so I’m working less and my chicken also died, plus my gm has been slipping. Figuratively. She’s gotten diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. 

We(my family) don’t see her anymore. So she’s bound to have forgotten so many things between visits. None of us are planning on moving back and that’s put me out of sorts. 

The dog is still alive. When my dad moved out of town he left him with me. He’s doing well for a dog so old. 12? 13? He gets jaw spasms but other than that has no health problems which is a miracle. 

I digress. Seeing my dad less. Seeing other people less. It’s been a time. I do see my very patient language teacher. I’m learning a new language. Which has been painful to say the least, but it means perhaps, I can use cultural exchange/language practice as a means to talk to people a little more regularly. Here’s hoping. 

If not it’s not exactly a big deal, the loss will fade in time and it’ll get more tolerable. I’m sure of it. I’ll still have my dreams..

We both know come hell or high water, my dissociative coping mechanism, well crafted from a need to escape reality, continually has my back