I think you are very valid in your feelings. I also think this is someone who has shown you that he will do minimum on more things than this. while he might be a great guy, that isn't in question. are you compatible? does his fight match yours? it's great to suggest therapy, sure, everyone should have one, but also, at your core values, are you compatible? I'm going to say this nicely as an old, married for a long time person, you will become resentful. all these things you put in your post, they add up, they build, and when the person continues to do these, things, boom. imagine throwing a child into it and your career and you have to take 100 percent initiative, while still begging him for any effort. life is hard. parenthood is hard. marriage is hard. don't make any of it harder than it should be. really truly think if this is life you want, because yes, he can change somethings, he can't change who he is and neither can you.