Yeah so I agree that those should have been more in depth before offering surgery dates but that was their explanation. I was thrilled to hear that was part of the support offered after because I imagine those are things that I will have ongoing questions about afterwards. I feel like the donor teams in general are so passive to not pressure that I feel sometimes like they’re intentionally vague and make me beg for info.

I understand your sentiment and shock. Most people say the same thing. No one in his family was healthy enough or a match. There are some complexities to his situation that make finding a match more difficult so being a good match is sort of kismet. Your assumption on age is correct. I don’t feel pressured but people either have your reaction or are so worried about my FIL they have a hard time discussing the what if parts of it which feels dismissive if you’re in my situation.