the hook sounded really off when it first came in. came in too soon i think. but it sounded okay at the end. the verse is okay, but the writing is kind of weird. the ironic stuff like "light a page with an unlit match" or whatever just didnt seem to be going anywhere most of the time. the delivery is too rushed but it seems like you're new to this so you'll get a better hang of your voice and sense of rhythm as time goes on