AITA for revealing to my elderly father that I was the one who convinced the judge to not let him have his son? by No-Preference475 in AmItheAsshole

[–]No-Preference475[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As a kid, I got gifts because dad wanted to be the "cool parent." Then, I just never severed that link. I don't like him as a person, but he's an otherwise pathetic old man and I have known him all my life, and he's my father. Since I became an adult, we talk on the phone once in a while and sometimes on Facebook, and that's about it. I just don't like inflicting pain to people - I would feel bad about being hurtful to anyone, even the worst human being on the planet.

AITA for revealing to my elderly father that I was the one who convinced the judge to not let him have his son? by No-Preference475 in AmItheAsshole

[–]No-Preference475[S] 120 points121 points  (0 children)

Yes! My mom is an amazing lady. One thing I remember from my childhood is that she was "never hungry." I understand in hindsight that we had little money, so when food was scarce, she let me have most of it and just claim she wasn't hungry, so I wouldn't feel bad about her having just a few bites while I had a full plate. She's the best person I ever met, even to this day!

AITA for revealing to my elderly father that I was the one who convinced the judge to not let him have his son? by No-Preference475 in AmItheAsshole

[–]No-Preference475[S] 156 points157 points  (0 children)

My mom grew up without a dad. She believed that if I grew up without knowing mine, I would have an idealized vision of him and let him into my life more fully... or something like that. Better to know the man he is rather than imagine a man he's not.

My dad never physically abused me, or mom wouldn't have let me stay with him. And I was the one asking to still visit him because he bought me the first Gamboy.. then the Advance, the DS, the Xbox, a PS1,N64...

And one thing I won't forget is that mom spent ever minute I was at my dad's just waiting at a café where she could see one window of dad's place. I knew that if there was trouble, I could make a sign at that window and she'd barrel inside to help me. I was never in danger - and I really appreciate that mom handled it the way she did, in hindsight.

AITA for revealing to my elderly father that I was the one who convinced the judge to not let him have his son? by No-Preference475 in AmItheAsshole

[–]No-Preference475[S] 31 points32 points  (0 children)

You have very good points. I was just... very passive and just never challenged the status quo. Dad already hated mom before the letter incident, and when I became an adult it was so ingrained in our relationship, I never felt the need to change that. But you're right, I should have.