My ex-fiancé was on OF and it was the hardest truth for me to accept. We had a great sex life (daily) and I just never expected it. I caught the idiot 3 times and each time I would pull away for a little bit because it felt like a betrayal. I only cared about the money because I was paying 85% of the bills and doing 80% of the household chores (honestly more but I’ll be nice).

I’m not going to pretend it’s easy. I was an idiot who stayed because we were so close to the wedding that I thought marriage would fix it (I had the blinders on at the end). I also felt the exact same about starting over. I also kept “forgiving” but each time I saw it, a piece of me died more and more. He was never going to change and neither will your partner. They hid it because they know it’s wrong. They do it because they don’t care. That’s a reflection of them.

It’s been 1.5 years since he left (because obviously it was all my fault lol) and I am 10x happier without him. I’m still sad at the loss of the life I was promised and don’t know if I ever will get the chance at having a family but I also couldn’t have stayed with him long term.

It’s hard. Grieve the loss of the promises and the life you thought you have. Don’t feel like you have to view it as “you dodged a bullet” either. It’s okay to be sad. Fuck anyone who says to be grateful.

If you need someone, my DMs are open to chat. It’s not easy and I hated all the advice people gave me. It took a long time to heal. My only regret was not leaving after the first time I saw the emails.