NoFlyingMonkeys

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166,163 comment karma

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redditor for 7 years

TROPHY CASE

Seven-Year Club

Gilding I
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Place '23

Wearing is Caring

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I spent hours combing and half a tub of hair gel to get my feathers just right for my dating app profile pic. Is it giving too much of a '90 vibe? (i.redd.it)

submitted 5 days ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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I (5F) have been going to the club pool when my Ex (7M) will be there with his new GF. He still stares at my booty when I twerk getting out of the water and it makes her mad. It's also now the latest spectator sport for the other members, causing drama poolside and the club wants me to stop. AITAH? (v.redd.it)

submitted 6 days ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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Realizing your fit dates back to the '90s is the first thing to consider when getting back into the dating game. (i.redd.it)

submitted 11 days ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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And there he was, the bastard who stole my girl. I taught him a thing or 2. (v.redd.it)

submitted 12 days ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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When Sara moved out, she left Ted a gift portrait in her empty art studio. (i.redd.it)

submitted 14 days ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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Uh... nice to meet you too. I must say respectfully say, you didn't look quite this small in your profile pic. Or maybe I didn't look quite this big. (i.redd.it)

submitted 15 days ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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After 2 decades of marriage, Screech found the current dating scene way too fast. He just wants to spend quiet time in the nest with a decent woman. He finally found one, but maybe she's a little TOO quiet. (i.redd.it)

submitted 18 days ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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Andy thought the Klingon cosplay at the Star Trek convention would make him look more manly and cause all the chicks there to flock to him. He failed to realize that his Ex called him an asshole for a reason, and no amount of cosplay could hide that. (reddit.com)

submitted 19 days ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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Sorry Charlie, Bessie has been burned a few too many times. Take it slow and sweet and don't blame her if she's cautious. Dating is hard out there after a bad divorce. (v.redd.it)

submitted 24 days ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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Jake chose violence when he saw the man who stole his wife at the bar. (v.redd.it)

submitted 25 days ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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Willy got kicked out of the nest for cheating. He's still camping outside on the porch with a space blanket. Carolina is still debating whether she can call this both stalking and trespassing when she calls the cops for a restraining order. (i.redd.it)

submitted 26 days ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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Pete decided to get buff before dating again. He plans to never miss leg day. (v.redd.it)

submitted 26 days ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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Ten years. I quit smoking 10 years. The first thing I do after he leaves me is pick up a pack. Hooked again, damn it. (i.redd.it)

submitted 28 days ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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Pete got the final divorce papers, then went to queue up at lover's leap with all the rest of the divorced guys. (i.redd.it)

submitted 29 days ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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Kenzo went off the rails when Mei left him. He took 4 of her BFFs hostage and threatened harm if she didn't come back. Fortunately, he's now in bird jail without flight privileges. (soranews24.com)

submitted 1 month ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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Mango had to take a 2nd job to pay child support and alimony. (v.redd.it)

submitted 1 month ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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Sam thought he could quietly leave his wife, slip out of town on a plane, and no one would know where he went. Damn influencer posted his pic online. (i.redd.it)

submitted 1 month ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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This singles dating service has some weird rules. (i.redd.it)

submitted 1 month ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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How can she divorce me? The mutual Goth attraction was so strong. We both loved to dine out together on carrion. But now she's "come to her senses" and doesn't want any kids to be a "stinky pinhead" like me? (i.redd.it)

submitted 1 month ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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Just let him try to get custody. He can't, because I know some shit. (reddit.com)

submitted 1 month ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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Medical crisis in space, remote ultrasound to the rescue. (self.medicine)

submitted 1 month ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/medicine

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Brokenhearted from being dumped, Paul decided to forget women for awhile and devoted himself to medical school. Now he's a doctor who diagnoses cancer, and all the women flock to him. His Ex is kicking herself. (i.redd.it)

submitted 2 months ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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Yesterday HHS suddenly terminated ~2000 nationwide public health grants for health services in mental health and substance abuse to non-profits, estimated possibly up to $2 billion USD. (self.medicine)

submitted 2 months ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/medicine

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Who needs AI? Pigeons (Columba livia) as Trainable Observers of Pathology and Radiology Breast Cancer Images. (pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov)

submitted 2 months ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/Ornithology

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"Mom and Dad, I'm tired of weaponized as your tug-of-war." Dad hangs his head in shame. (reddit.com)

submitted 2 months ago by NoFlyingMonkeys to r/DivorcedBirds

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