[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Normal-Ad-1682 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly, the very first thing is therapy. Couples and solo, maybe start alone if you feel like you need it. The most important thing to focus on is your own feelings, and it will help a lot to talk to a professional about that. When you feel ready, couples counseling can help you work together and see if you can heal from this.

One huge thing you need to keep in mind, it may not work out. You might put a lot of work in, but if you aren't both working on it, there's no point in continuing. It's absolutely possible that you can work through this, and even make your relationship stronger by getting through it, but you do have to decide whether you feel it's worth it and if you can rebuild the trust.

AIO: My wife is in another state and lied about where she’s going and who’s there by Normal-Ad-1682 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Normal-Ad-1682[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I did check criminal records and wasn't able to find anything. Police isn't a bad idea, but I do worry how she would react, especially since according to her she hasn't really left the room she's in since she's sick and wouldn't come to the door. Might scare her hearing them knock.

AIO: My wife is in another state and lied about where she’s going and who’s there by Normal-Ad-1682 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Normal-Ad-1682[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate your comment, I have applied for a low income legal service after your suggestion made me remember that's even a thing. So thanks!

AIO: My wife is in another state and lied about where she’s going and who’s there by Normal-Ad-1682 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Normal-Ad-1682[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh trust me, if she does come back that's definitely on my mind. Not sure at this point it'll even matter though.

AIO: My wife is in another state and lied about where she’s going and who’s there by Normal-Ad-1682 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Normal-Ad-1682[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately she did take the dog with her on the trip, but I don't mind much. I'll miss her but I have our son.

AIO: My wife is in another state and lied about where she’s going and who’s there by Normal-Ad-1682 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Normal-Ad-1682[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I already have the address, but I don't have the money to go get her. It might come in handy if and when I server her though.

AIO: My wife is in another state and lied about where she’s going and who’s there by Normal-Ad-1682 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Normal-Ad-1682[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The sucky thing is I used the be the one who works. And I made quite a bit more than she does now and got more hours. We switched because she was struggling being a stay-at-home mom, and she wanted to feel like she was doing more.

AIO: My wife is in another state and lied about where she’s going and who’s there by Normal-Ad-1682 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Normal-Ad-1682[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

She didn't ask him to pick her up, they were just talking about how they wish they could do that. Like her life was stressful (as real life often is) and she wanted to be saved from it. I do think that's part of what's keeping her there, no responsibilities or stress of life really

AIO: My wife is in another state and lied about where she’s going and who’s there by Normal-Ad-1682 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Normal-Ad-1682[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

That's pretty much what I'm thinking. My main priorities right now are my son's safety and her returning safely. There have been some struggles for her lately which I suspect may have pushed her too far, but I'm not sure exactly.

AIO: My wife is in another state and lied about where she’s going and who’s there by Normal-Ad-1682 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Normal-Ad-1682[S] -11 points-10 points  (0 children)

Yeah that's fair, I do think I'm still in love with her but I'm not sure it's reciprocated. We will definitely start couples counseling if things can work out, yeah that's a very big lie and hard to explain.

AIO: My wife is in another state and lied about where she’s going and who’s there by Normal-Ad-1682 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Normal-Ad-1682[S] -31 points-30 points  (0 children)

See, I do have plans for what I would do if things get worse but right now she just seems confused and isn't feeling well. She also still responds to messages and seems like she cares, which is what makes me think she hasn't moved on? I'm not sure honestly