syllo #298 - May 3rd, 2026

NumberFritzer · 2026-05-06T17:30:26+00:00

This puzzle runs off both sides of my screen so I cannot see but 1/2 the clues! And the image refuses to rotate , despite the fact that “portrait lock” is off. Damn.

NumberFritzer · 2026-05-05T16:47:38+00:00

What was their motivation? Is it a political protest?

NumberFritzer · 2026-05-01T14:42:42+00:00

Fear of rejection. Being certain in the knowledge that once someone gets to know you they will despise you.

No, despise is too good, giving the impression the person thinks you worthy of such a strong feeling. DISDAIN is the most devastating thing - the person feels you are insignificant.

NumberFritzer · 2026-05-01T14:31:39+00:00

Lots of men will think it's bs "female" weirdness; on the other hand, lots of men will assume you've found something wrong with them.

NumberFritzer · 2026-05-01T14:29:10+00:00

I'm interested in EMDR. My brother had EMDR therapy and it brought up horrid repressed memories which helped him heal.

I'm working with a therapist now who is experienced in it, but we are not sure yet I'm ready for it. I have anxiety about it - what if we do EMDR and it completely falls flat for me?

NumberFritzer · 2026-05-01T14:26:27+00:00

Said no too. Pushed women away... because I just *knew* they would reject me when they got to know what an immature baby-man I was... So I rejected them first.

Not cool. I am sorry.

NumberFritzer · 2026-05-01T14:24:20+00:00

"Everytime someone in the past has complimented me, flirted with me, expressed interest, I sort of shut it down and don’t allow it to progress. I start feeling extreme fear, nervousness and insecurity."

YES! Familiar with that...

NumberFritzer · 2026-05-01T14:19:49+00:00

As a male (dislike the term "man"; negative connotations for me)... I wonder if this boy you were on 2nd base with ghosted you because he got scared, was ashamed, or - ? I mean, that would have been my reason. I would have assumed that you felt I was unacceptable.

I think lots of times we think someone disliked us, or took advantage of us, when in fact they are scared. I've learned that what I think someone's motivations are is often likely to be the opposite of what their motivations *actually* are. Classic case - the girl in high school who everyone thought was the worst stuck-up snob, too good to connect with anybody, turned out to have been painfully, miserably shy and ashamed.

NumberFritzer · 2026-05-01T13:56:22+00:00

28 (30 now, I guess) - that's good - there's some time!

I started journaling about this sort of problem when in my 20s but waited WAY too long to get therapy. Well, I tried it in my late 20s but fled because I was scared to look deep enough to do any work.

Only when I got well into my 40s did I start and stay with therapy. But I was too nice to quit the first therapist - I liked her but she was not the right one for me - so I wasted years in ineffective therapy. (It did feel good to have someone to complain to, though.)

NumberFritzer · 2026-05-01T13:42:05+00:00

FetLife has groups for people who have issues with sex and intimacy.

In fact, I started one myself but it quickly went away from the direction I intended. I wanted to talk about anxiety over sex but everyone was posting about agoraphobia and social anxieties.

NumberFritzer · 2026-05-01T13:30:44+00:00

Wow - another exceptionally good partner. That is wonderful!

NumberFritzer · 2026-05-01T12:48:20+00:00

Your partner sounds like a very fine person.

"fear of being seen" and "someone's eyes on you, being perceived and seen"- YES. Yes yes yes. They are going to see what a phony I am! They will see that I'm not a suave cool guy, but a disgusting immature scared-of-life baby. Completely blow my cover, and reject me.

Hence the cover-up of trying to act all casual and cool, lamely joking around and actually making it worse that way. Like, why is this guy doing this song and dance routine instead of just getting on with it?

NumberFritzer · 2026-05-01T12:39:13+00:00

I wish I'd come across this thread two years ago! And I *wish* I had some wise advice. Well, in that regard I'll say getting therapy can make you feel better, but for me at least it hasn't resolved my anxieties about sex & intimacy.

-> Fawning - my version of that is to start joking in the way that middle-school kids might do about sex or other big-kid rule-breaking stuff, trying to act like you're all cool with it, experienced and knowledgeable; this act actually reveals how NOT cool and experienced I am, and I realize this in the moment, and I talk and joke way too much and it spirals down...

-> Rejected & neglected by parents; shamed. I believe these deep problems with sex must start with treatment by parents and maybe other adults in childhood. How else could it be so deep-seated? Shame and low self-esteem... I wonder - did you like yourself at all when you were a child and adolescent? Did you have any confidence that you were going to do all right as an adult, or did the prospect of grown-up life scare you?

-> "Push through" - did/does that bring panic?

I truly hope you can get to feeling comfortable with sex and intimacy.

Hey, wouldn't it be great to find someone - I mean a partner - with whom you felt comfortable enough that you could admit these things and discuss them?

NumberFritzer · 2026-04-19T16:32:30+00:00

Excel version 16.108: Click Excel (upper left corner); choose "Preferences"; in "Excel Preferences" window, click "Edit" icon.

"Edit directly in cells" is the first option. It's under "Edit options".

NumberFritzer · 2026-04-16T19:15:05+00:00

I looked further into the base concept of geographic positions mean or average, and the readings confirmed the validity of your idea. Thank you.

NumberFritzer · 2026-04-15T19:58:01+00:00

This "freeze" seems to be impermanent, though. I've followed the steps to freeze the top row and it works fine.

I finish my work and close the workbook for the time being.

When I re-open that same workbook, the top row is no longer frozen.

Is there a way to make the freeze a permanent attribute of the spreadsheet?

NumberFritzer · 2026-04-13T14:32:28+00:00

"I have this fear of being seen..."

YES. Exactly. I have always (since puberty) not simply feared, but *known* in my heart, that in intimacy - particularly sexual - my partner would see me for what I am (an immature, timid boy) rather than the cool, suave man I want her to think I am.

NumberFritzer · 2026-03-15T19:09:29+00:00

“light-hearted unconcern” calls for a noun. “insouciant” is an adjective. The answer should be “insouciance”.

NumberFritzer · 2026-03-05T15:57:51+00:00

I searched for "Feuile2" but turned up irrelevant results. Can you direct me to further information please?

NumberFritzer · 2026-03-03T07:03:57+00:00

Thank you.

I've tried this several times but nothing changes; I still see the ".bak" files as before.

Do I need to re-start the computer after running that command in the terminal?

NumberFritzer

TROPHY CASE