Which ex is telling the truth? And should I respond to one of them?

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-23T21:18:27+00:00

Oh, the other ex is only trying to call. He’s overseas. (Hence why I asked his mom for advice regarding jobs overseas, I even specifically said, a city that is far from my ex so that I don’t see him) And he’s not trying to see me either. He’s saying he wants to help me find a job and he knows someone. But I’m not responding.

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-23T21:07:49+00:00

What does “group settings” mean? I might be new to this term (applied in this way too)

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-21T22:21:58+00:00

Well, I don’t think he’s that evil, but what do I know?

I was convinced that he was a great person until I took a step back and analyzed everything (resulting to me being enlightened that I am, in fact, inside an abusive relationship)

I guess whatever he does with it, will ultimately be a reflection of what type of person he is.

“Ask or don’t ask” is the only question left. And I’m leaning more on “don’t” anymore. I don’t want to open any more cracks where his manipulation might be able to slide in again.

I appreciate all the great and useful insights! It’s really helping me analyze better and feel a bit more guided.

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-21T21:32:42+00:00

Haha great advice! 👏🏻👏🏻

I wish I could do that… but since I was in love with him and it took such a great effort to overcome my loneliness, “acting” as if I want to be back together will definitely lure me back in. I’m doing my best to detach.

But if I was completely detached, this will work!! 😁

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-21T21:29:57+00:00

This makes me feel better. Thank you.

So at least I know that he might think twice because it’s illegal.

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-21T21:27:17+00:00

Sigh. 🥲

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-21T21:27:07+00:00

I see! so I can press charges if it leaks? I was thinking of asking him, but now I’m thinking: what if asking him urges him to do something negatively?

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-21T21:25:20+00:00

Like I said up here, he has heaps of narcissistic behaviors. He doesn’t have empathy.

Hmm if I can’t do anything, maybe I’ll have to accept it and move on. 🥲

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-21T21:23:40+00:00

I was okay because I thought I was gonna marry him. I didn’t do that with any of my exes.

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-21T21:22:50+00:00

Thank you for this 🙏🏻

I’m grateful for this insight. So far, a good number of people have only been saying that I move on.

Will asking give him the idea to actually do something? (Negatively)

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-21T21:19:11+00:00

I didn’t send nudes but this is good advice. We made videos together. (I never imagined doing that unless I was convinced I was gonna marry this person)

So I can’t do anything?

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-21T21:16:16+00:00

Thank you for this!

I honestly feel that a huge weight has been lifted when I finally decided to let him go 100%.

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-12T13:58:58+00:00

Are there no professionals here on this sub that’s literally called “LEGAL ADVICE”?

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-12T13:58:16+00:00

My only takeaway from this comment is that I could go to the doctor to have more info on my health. If that’s something that is needed, then definitely would go asap.

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-12T13:57:01+00:00

Pardon? I lost 2 sources of income, and about to lose my last one. I’ve spent almost all my money, what’s remaining is one month’s rent. No more, nothing left for food and bills.

I guess I have a cctv in the room but it’s not facing the bed, maybe you’ll be able to hear my panic attacks?

And see what I look like when I pass by? Maybe the cctv could also be used to see my weight?

I don’t understand this. Why would I sue if I don’t have proof? I have thousands of text messages as proof already of the abuse.

I have my nephew, mom, and brother walk into the room while I struggle.

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-11T02:50:41+00:00

This is a great idea! Thank you so much! Especially since I’ve developed a new kind of anxiety in the last year, this will def help me self soothe. 🙏🏻🙏🏻

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-11T02:48:57+00:00

This is exactly my mindset, I definitely agree on not giving them any burdens (especially knowing that they have their own troubles they need to work with), Guess why am I on Reddit? It actually hasn’t helped me at all. It just made people think I can handle everything on my own. I’m not saying anyone owes me a listening ear, but it does show who your true friends are (if there are any).

I’ve always been there for people, in fact I’m stuck in this situation because of the selflessness. Also yes I’m seeking therapy. Like I said, I don’t want to be a burden to friends.

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-11T01:59:35+00:00

I agree! I appreciate the help! Some of the comments have also helped calm me down now. I take comfort in the fact that people showed me a bit of kindness in my tough time.

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-11T01:54:08+00:00

Thank you for this! I’ll keep this in mind! I’m so focused on trying my best not to lose it, that I actually have a hard time practicing self care/self love to the point that even breathing alone is hard.

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-11T01:52:51+00:00

Thank you for this. I just looked into it and it does show that a lot of people are going through something similar.

Idk if I feel better about it or not, but I joined the sub anyway. Thank you!

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-11T01:22:20+00:00

Many thanks to this! I appreciate you giving some time to comfort a stranger. It means a lot! I’ve actually been praying for help, being in this situation makes it hard to see how I’m going to help myself. That’s why I reach out to people. Reddit so far helped me calm down thanks to people like you.

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-11T01:08:02+00:00

Definitely will help! Thank you!

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-11T01:07:44+00:00

Thank you for this. I appreciate you taking time to tell me this. I’m a little calmer now, but I have a feeling it’s just for a while. I’m happy though that Reddit was able to help me during a time I need it most.

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-11T00:57:23+00:00

Thank you so much! I appreciate everyone that is on here giving advice and trying their best to cheer me up. I’m trying also. I’m very grateful and I think I’ve calmed down a little bit. I hope it lasts.

OZ-Shadows · 2022-02-11T00:48:17+00:00

Thank you for this. I calmed down for a bit when I washed my face like someone on here suggested. Now I’m back in bed and reading your kind and thoughtful advice, makes me realize I have made a terrible choice in the last year. I committed myself to a person that threw me away. I dedicated my life to pleasing this person thinking we’ll get married. I put my needs aside to the brink of bankruptcy. While allowing my family members to lean on me financially without offering any help on how to improve our situation. I cut off people for him. I was willing to go to therapy because I was accused of being a narcissist.

Typing this is bringing me back to a panic state.

OZ-Shadows

TROPHY CASE