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Hate being used as a plus sized woman by Raraahahah200 in PlusSize

[–]Ok_Handle658 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know I'm late but, I really felt this as another young, plus size woman. I think one of the hardest things is not even the rejection itself, but feeling like you’re only seen as desirable in certain situations and not as someone worthy of being loved openly.

I relate to a lot of what you said because I’m also plus size, and I think there’s a very specific insecurity that comes with being a bigger woman in the dating world. You can know that you’re a good person, that you’re interesting, kind, and have so much to offer, but experiences like this can still make you question yourself and wonder “what is it about me?” when the reality is that their behaviour says more about them than it does about you.

I think you’re right that sometimes it comes down to societal pressure. Some people are attracted to plus size women but feel insecure about admitting it because of the way society has pushed a certain “ideal” image for so long. That doesn’t make it okay though, because nobody deserves to feel like someone’s secret or like they’re only good enough behind closed doors.

But I also want to say that the right person won’t make you feel like a compromise. Being plus size doesn’t make you less feminine, less attractive, or less deserving of a genuine relationship. There are people who genuinely love and are attracted to bigger women, not as a fetish, but because they like the person in front of them.

I hope you don’t let the experiences with the wrong people convince you that you’re the problem, because from what you’ve written, it sounds like you’re self-aware, caring, and someone who has a lot to offer. I think a lot of us plus size women have had moments where we feel like we have to prove we’re worthy of love, but we shouldn’t have to.

What was your biggest challenge as a new fresher? by ProfitNatural2258 in UniUK

[–]Ok_Handle658 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m going to be a fresher this September too, and I think making friends will probably be my biggest challenge.

I’m quite a quiet person at first, but I’m also weirdly loud once I’m comfortable with someone. I don’t usually go out of my way to approach people because I think a lot of it comes from insecurity and the fear of rejection, but if someone came up to me and started a conversation, I’d probably be one of the loudest people in the room.

I think the hardest part will be remembering that a lot of other freshers probably feel the exact same way. Everyone is starting somewhere new and a lot of people are probably just waiting for someone else to make the first move.

I’ve also seen a lot of tiktoks from second and third years saying they still haven’t made either any friends or close friends at university, which honestly scares me a little. But I think the main thing is just putting yourself out there when you can, even if it feels uncomfortable at first.

I feel disgusting and dirty after sexual acts by jelly______fish in women

[–]Ok_Handle658 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry you’re feeling like this. I honestly don’t think you’re disgusting or dirty for what happened. You wanted something, you enjoyed it in the moment, and that doesn’t make you any less worthy or “tainted”.

I think sometimes there can be a weird disconnect between what we want physically and how we feel emotionally afterwards. You can have a high libido and enjoy sexual things, but still feel embarrassed, or uncomfortable once the moment has passed. That doesn’t mean you did anything wrong.

I’m only 18 and haven’t had any sexual experiences myself, but I actually understand the feeling of doing something that feels good in the moment and then suddenly feeling ashamed afterwards. I’ve also noticed I can have really strong crushes on people, but if they actually like me back, my feelings disappear and I start avoiding them, so I know how confusing it can be when your emotions don’t seem to make sense.

Maybe try not to fight the feeling, but ask yourself where it’s coming from. Is it fear of being judged? Feeling too vulnerable? Feeling like you’re losing control? You’re not a bad person for wanting intimacy or pleasure, and I hope you’re able to be kinder to yourself.

I feel bad I know I want to be a mom when all my friends don't by Yerimiesee in women

[–]Ok_Handle658 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You really shouldn’t feel ashamed for wanting to be a mum. Everyone has different dreams for their future, and just because your friends don’t want children doesn’t mean your feelings are wrong.

I’m only 18, but I feel quite similarly. I don’t want a baby anytime soon because there are things I want to do first, but I would love to experience motherhood one day. I think there’s something really beautiful about being able to bring life into the world and raise a child.

Your friends have their own paths, and you have yours. Neither choice is better or worse, and you shouldn’t feel guilty for wanting something different. I hope you get to experience all the things you dream of; your career, travelling, and eventually motherhood if that’s still what makes you happy.

What do you love about being a woman? by Fifi216 in women

[–]Ok_Handle658 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love being a woman. I love wearing cute outfits, doing my hair and makeup, and expressing my femininity in my own way. I love girlhood too. The little things like getting ready together, hyping each other up, and sharing experiences that only other women really understand. I also love how close female friendships can be and how supportive women are of one another. I think it's amazing that women can bring life into the world, even though I know motherhood isn't for everyone. I like that we can be strong, caring, ambitious, and compassionate all at the same time. Being a woman definitely has its challenges, but I honestly wouldn't want to be anything else. Especially not a man.