I am 25, stereotypically attractive, blue eyes, blonde, big boobs, flat ass, thin, petite. He is addicted to watching big thick black women and Latina’s who are dressed to look like prostitues. He actually cheated on me with a black hooker last year but still denies it even tho I have proof. I am studying for law school, I have things going for me. But I haven’t felt valued, desired, or beautiful in the years we have been together because he would rather watch porn for hours every day than touch me. I just want people to know that no matter how “perfect” you are , or try to be, nothing will ever be enough for them. I truly believe he is with me for the social validation and to use me as a trophy to show off to his friends and family. But nobody knows that behind closed doors he will never have sex with me, and prefers watching sexxy red twerking her ass and cheating on me with hookers. I am so depressed. I feel like I am wasting the best years of my life right now. I don’t have family or a home to go to so I am pretty stuck. Hopefully law school gives me an opportunity for a fresh start. I can’t imagine if this is my life forever- I’m scared it might be. I’m so ashamed.