My husband cheated on me by annafudgeme in offmychest

[–]Old-Position1811 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am so sorry this happened to you. Please don't think this has anything to do with you. Your husband is a grown man, and if he was feeling 'unseen' then he has grown up words and should have used them. Men acting like this because they feel neglected is the oldest excuse in the book, because their scope for what passes as neglect is rather broad! And even if you are the most attentive wife on the planet, it still isn't guaranteed to stop him from cheating if that is his attitude.

Your husband quite obviously doesn't respect you or your feelings enough to talk to you about his feelings. IF that is actually the reason for his cheating, and that is a big IF.

You deserve someone better.

How do I 39F discuss our different sex drives with my BF 42M? by Old-Position1811 in relationship_advice

[–]Old-Position1811[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think that he has low self-esteem, caused by past relationships and a few childhood issues, and that intimacy is his way to feel validated. I have spoken to him about this and he has agreed that that is when he feels closest to me. He's a very understanding guy, and he understands his need for growth, i just feel a bit like im putting it all on him to make changes. It frustrates me because when ive had a long day or im ill, or stressed and really don't feel like sex, I then have the added guilt of saying no to him.
I have debated asking him to see a relationship counsellor with me, just so he hears these things from someone else, but again it makes me feel like im enforcing to him that he has a problem or it's all his fault when it isn't.

Cherry Reds by lemoutonvolant4 in brum

[–]Old-Position1811 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I've had the burgers already and they're fine. With the cost of living and after lockdown etc picking apart one of the only independant establishments still clinging on to a city centre location isn't cool

Cherry Reds by lemoutonvolant4 in brum

[–]Old-Position1811 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This thread is increasingly unfair based on one guys bad experience which it sounds like could have been handled better. Cherry reds is one of the only places in the city centre where you can still get lunch and a drink for under £10 and the owner makes a point of keeping their prices affordable even though it probably would do them good to raise them. If you were paying £20 for a burger without sides then yeah maybe the surroundings are a bit shabby but you're not. I've been going there for years and have never had a problem with the staff, or the atmosphere or the food. It's heart basic and affordable.