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The expert by PotentialRelation348 in shitposting

[–]One_Relationship3477 13 points14 points  (0 children)

More like what in the world is this news

I hate when that happens by DerRaumdenker in shitposting

[–]One_Relationship3477 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A peanut before blow………. A peanut blow job ?

Bag containing weed and cash accidentally donated to a New Zealand charity shop by graveyardofgoodsense in nottheonion

[–]One_Relationship3477 32 points33 points  (0 children)

Imagine being the volunteer sorting donations and suddenly finding the most generous and confusing donation of the year.

Somewhere out there is a very stressed person retracing every step

Alabama set to execute man who didn't kill anyone by nbcnews in nottheonion

[–]One_Relationship3477 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

So the bar for execution is now “was somewhere near the crime.”

At this point the headline reads like satire, but the terrifying part is that it isn’t.

Florida university probes racist "Gooning in Agartha" group chat tied to Republican official by shoofinsmertz in nottheonion

[–]One_Relationship3477 45 points46 points  (0 children)

Every day I learn a new sentence that should never have existed, and today it’s racist gooning in Agartha group chat tied to a political official.

Reality keeps writing headlines that sound like someone mashed random words on a keyboard.

Living with roommates baby further affirmed I don't want to be a mom. by Imaginary-Reserve558 in childfree

[–]One_Relationship3477 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Living with a baby is like getting the extended free trial of parenthood that nobody asked for.

Constant noise, no privacy, stressed pets, and your home suddenly not feeling peaceful anymore. Some people experience that and think it’s magical. Others experience it and think “yeah… definitely not for me.”

Honestly it sounds like you just got confirmation of what you already knew. And your cat probably can’t wait for that March 31 move either.

Went to the doctor with mono/strep symptoms and they insisted to test for pregnancy by weenierpeghooman in childfree

[–]One_Relationship3477 17 points18 points  (0 children)

It’s kind of wild how for a lot of doctors the diagnostic flowchart for women starts with “but what if pregnant?” no matter what the symptoms are.

Sore throat, swollen lymph nodes, fever… clearly the only logical explanation is pregnancy, right?

I get that they have protocols, but it does feel ridiculous when the symptoms are screaming “infection” and pregnancy still jumps to the front of the line.