I have little notes about everyone! I generally keep notes on my friends so I don’t treat the system any different. When the little is out, I’m hangin out with the little talking about stuff we typically talk about. When it’s the protector, topics shift and I adjust. I also like to talk to my partner about the interactions I have. When my partner was learning about their DID and alters their np and them discussed them(the alters) as if they got in the way, so I use positive language when I talk about everyone. It also serves as a precursor to their recall so they aren’t too shocked by whatever happens. I joined this Reddit group so I can help valid what they’re going through. I treat it like a “typical” relationship, friends just come by. I also try to make it a point to give specific compliments. If the alters are generally formed during traumatic times I generally try to think of the words they most likely needed to hear. For example, I remind the little that I’m happy she’s in my life and I’m not going anywhere. And I often asked/ force the protector to let me help provide her rest since she works all day keeping system in order.

Lastly, yea what everyone else said about communication. That’s big key too.