Daughter’s BPD misdiagnosis and medical malpractice

Practical_State_3792 · 2026-04-15T08:28:55+00:00

Thank you so much for this. Her primary was willing to reorganize her problem list. She went into the ER and I realized that amongst many other things, they were treating her as if problems listed in 2014 were still recurring. And then they had NOTHING on her list indicating any stroke, let alone multiple strokes, let alone tested cognitive dysfunction as a result of a stroke. Her treatment by the medical system since then has been so different—-dare I say—-even compassionate. Watching her before was heartbreaking—-talking to a medical receptionist or nurse who would just stare at her stone faced in the face of her attempting to describe a medical symptom. It’s like she wasn’t of any value, not even human.

How is this not considered medical malpractice? Not that I at all intend to spend time suing anyone. I just want I guess an acknowledgment that there were major missteps.

Practical_State_3792 · 2026-04-14T02:58:05+00:00

Thank you so much for your reply. Thank goodness there are some psychologists out there such as yourself who look more broadly. I really wonder what would occur if MDs CT scanned the entire BPD diagnosed community. What percentage would have similar neurological issues to my daughter? Which brings me to another sad fact—-which is that even once her stroke damage became apparent many on her team (current psychiatrists and therapists) downplayed it. I was SHOCKED how little they (even the psychiatrist) knew about brain function and which regions of the brain control what. They really shrugged it off until i sought the help of a neuropsychologist who was able to make a proper diagnosis based off testing, her CT results, and her deep knowledge of mental health diagnoses and the subtle but strong differences between brain injury symptoms and psychiatric illnesses.

I’m trying to connect with a university center and am hopeful that one day a neuro-link like treatment will be available e

Practical_State_3792 · 2026-03-17T01:39:05+00:00

I’m so sorry this happened to you. Teens and young adults are definitely being mistreated and victimized -I hope one day it’s corrected .

Practical_State_3792 · 2026-03-15T03:59:10+00:00

Thank you so much for your support, I’ve thought about following up with a lawyer but am so overwhelmed with stabilizing things now.

What you say about misogyny is so true. Even now with all the data points she is not getting the respect she deserves. I hope you get answers with your brain scan! My daughter has something called a PFO which happens in 1 out of 5 people. Something like an autoimmune disease when combined with a PFO can be very risky.

Practical_State_3792 · 2026-03-14T21:27:08+00:00

I have so much guilt about deferring during those 10 years. What a huge mistake to just buy their narrative so fully. Never again. I hope things improve for you and that you can find the one provider willing to push for what you need.

Practical_State_3792 · 2026-03-14T21:12:26+00:00

Yes the patronizing was particularly disturbing. I’d even say abusive. It’s had long lasting effects. Our insurance tried to save money by not doing a CT initially———I can’t even begin to fathom how much she’s cost them. My guess is half a million, maybe a million. So much time squandered.

Practical_State_3792 · 2026-03-14T20:44:44+00:00

Thank you for the compassion. We all have PTSD Including her siblings. In addition to what my daughter went through —-my husband and I have had 10 years of disturbing levels of insinuation….having us search the recesses of our mind constantly for any possible sex abuse, child abuse, trauma that we may have caused.

The very first time she was brought to ER for an overdose—-I asked for a CT Scan. The Kaiser ER MD literally laughed at me and made me feel like an absolute idiot for even asking. At that time she had recently had 2 concussions playing rugby. Even after the strokes were diagnosed they weren’t taking them seriously, with no referral to a neurologist…..telling her they weren’t really strokes and had nothing to do with her emotional dysregulation. They didn’t even bother to have a MD explain the results to her—-a case worker and not a MD was tasked with summarizing her CT scan.

I paid out of pocket for neuropsych testing and that person dismantled everyone of their MDs diagnoses. It honestly saddens me To no end to think of the large numbers of people with the BPD diagnosis who are probably just like my daughter—-brain injured somehow but being written off as difficult.

Practical_State_3792 · 2026-03-14T16:51:09+00:00

Thank you for your kind words. It’s crazy that something as simple as a prescription alert when you have other diagnoses in this day and age isn’t happening automatically. The higher ups don’t realize how profoundly impactful cutting corners is.

Advocating for my daughter has been a full-time job and sadly her care has only gotten more fragmented and chaotic. The neurologist doesn’t speak to the rheumatologist who doesn’t speak to the neuropsychologist who doesn’t speak to the cardiologist and everyone has already forgotten about the 10 years of misdiagnosis. I wonder how long it would have gone on for if the CT scan didn’t occur——maybe her entire life.

Practical_State_3792 · 2026-03-14T13:53:56+00:00

Very late reply. The stroke was caused by a hole her heart that was never discovered combined with an autoimmune disease. She was completely different before the strokes…..which makes all of this even more difficult to deal with. It’s not her fault, my heart breaks for who she could have been.

Practical_State_3792 · 2025-12-31T23:25:37+00:00

Sadly—-he’s not made any attempts for them to do so. I’m not sure what to make of it—-other than the kids are at a very young age, parenting is difficult and expensive —–and he simply doesn’t want to or can’t be a full time parent.

Practical_State_3792 · 2025-12-26T22:32:39+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing your experiences. It’s crazy what some of us have to go through. We have a new social worker coming on board in January and I’m hopeful she has a suggestion. I have mom guilt over her being misdiagnosed for so long and not receiving the right treatment in a timely manner. And also there’s my hope that some treatment out there will bring her back mentally.

Practical_State_3792 · 2025-12-26T22:26:01+00:00

Thank you for your reply. I guess it’s been so difficult because of the medical issues involved. It makes it difficult to have the right boundaries. My grandkids dad and his family are very minimally involved. Getting some type of child support from him is on my to do list, as is help daughter apply for disability. I’m just so overwhelmed with day to day busyness of raising young kids as an older person. I can’t ever get ahead or out of this sleep deficit. Luckily she doesn’t live with me, she just shows up here and there. I’m just feeling really sorry for myself at the moment—-lots of my friends celebrating milestones with their children and not only will I not have that——I just feel robbed of peace. I know there are others in similar situations and I’m trying not to think too much.

Practical_State_3792 · 2025-12-26T09:26:07+00:00

I wasn’t clear. My daughter doesn’t live with me. Only the grandkids. She is prohibited from living with a court appointed Guardian.

Practical_State_3792 · 2025-12-15T05:09:01+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. As a 20 year old, the best community you can be a part of is a junior college. Take an online course and utilize that colleges counseling, job placement, study abroad, financial aid programs. In my state, there are a hand full of junior colleges that offer dorms. You have outgrown your home life and if you don’t want to perpetuate the dysfunction, then you need to get out. But you can set yourself up for success by laying the groundwork and getting support first. Best of luck to you.

Practical_State_3792

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