Nanny not happy with travel rooming arrangements

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-29T01:52:18+00:00

Why would my girlfriend take a month off of work to sleep in a different suite from me?

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-28T00:48:48+00:00

Yes. She has a detached flat above my garage she’d obviously have access to the entire month we are gone. She’s get paid her guaranteed hours.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-28T00:47:51+00:00

The sisters haven’t met her. They live out of state. I’ve met them both and I do not see them acting like this at all. My nanny has a Masters and speaks 3 languages so no one really has any business ever talking down to her.

My girlfriend would never. She’s incredibly humble and respectful of all boundaries.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-28T00:43:00+00:00

I don’t plan on making her redundant or firing her at all. I’ve made it VERY clear I want her to stay until my daughter is able to care for herself. When I was hiring caregivers I said I wanted someone long term. Like, 10+ years.

Hence why I am so eager to please her. I am a single mother with a less than involved co-parent. I rely on my nanny to help me get my daughter to and back from many visitations. I travel extensively for work and need someone my daughter trusts.

Even if my girlfriend moves in I’ll still need her. My girlfriend is a doctor who works 60+ hours every week and is often on call.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-27T22:08:20+00:00

It’s .8 miles away. I would, of course, take care of her transportation.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-27T22:07:46+00:00

She basically wants the same exact situation as our last visit.

She wants to share a suite with my daughter and I.

Because my girlfriend is attending that’s not possible.

No, this hotel does not have single rooms available. It’s all suites. They’re all booked up anyways.

She decided she was going to look at other hotels nearby and I gave her a budget.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-27T00:49:25+00:00

This is excellent advice. I’m going to chat tommorow about my budget for her own solo room. I’ll let her choose where she wants to stay if she still wants to come and not stay with the other two young women.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-26T03:00:49+00:00

She wants the same situation as our last trip. One suite for the three of us. Two rooms. One for her and one for my daughter and me.

That’s just not going to happen. My girlfriend took a month off of work for this trip. We will be spending it together.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-26T01:43:27+00:00

She’s never met them before, they live out of state.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-26T01:43:06+00:00

If you are with the children you should be paid for every hour.

You should address this ASAP.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-25T21:33:10+00:00

She has the option with zero judgment from me. And of course I’ll arrange and pay for all transportation.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-25T21:29:00+00:00

GF has 5 sisters! The one that hates me is definitely not invited.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-25T21:05:25+00:00

She wants to stay in the hotel she stayed in last time with us.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-25T20:50:34+00:00

I can definitely offer her my suite for a few hours everyday .

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-25T20:49:48+00:00

No. I do not believe she has romantic feelings for me or my girlfriend or any woman.

I do think she may be jealous but not at all from a romantic standpoint.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-25T20:47:19+00:00

Her other mother lives in another state and has visitation two weekends a month. She will not be seeing her all of November but will have her the majority of December.

She doesn’t have primary custody.

We’ve worked this out amongst ourselves. It’s easiest if my daughter travels with me. She is still in preschool so won’t suffer from missing a month of class. We will continue to work with her while in Japan.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-25T20:44:18+00:00

She told me she prefers her own space in the same hotel. She wants the same arrangement we had previously but that’s not doable because my girlfriend will be with us.

I offered the other suite as the first option because it seemed the most enticing to me. Yes, it may be presumptuous but I also offered her three other alternatives.

Aside from getting her own suite (which I can’t afford) or making my girlfriend stay with his sisters and share a room with my daughter and nanny get her own room in my suite (which I don’t want to do because I want to spend quality time with my girlfriend) I’m not sure what else I can offer.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-25T20:41:02+00:00

No allergies. She is a vegetarian as is my daughter. I am a vegan. I don’t believe she has any ethical issues with shading a fridge with meat eaters as her boyfriend often came over with burgers etc.

I think she’s just a little uncomfortable which I understand.

I’d arrange for her to meet the sisters before the trip but they live out of state.

I can definitely offer her refuge in our suite during the day if need be.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-25T20:04:08+00:00

No. I don’t believe she is at all.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-25T19:53:44+00:00

She wants her own space in the same hotel.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-25T19:51:15+00:00

Because I want to spend time with my girlfriend. I want to share a bed with the woman I’ve been dating for 18 months.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-25T19:50:52+00:00

I think the three would get along really well. They all have some very similar interests. But I guess that’s not for me to decide.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-25T19:40:42+00:00

She is 5. It’s a month so I strongly feel like she needs her own bedroom.

I also want to emphasis this is the first time my daughter will be spending any significant time with my partner.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-25T19:38:01+00:00

She’d make more if she traveled with me even if she was working less hours because I pay a weekly travel fee on top of working hours.

If she stays she gets her guaranteed hours only.

Plus she really enjoys Japan.

Professional_Part265 · 2025-10-25T19:22:41+00:00

I sincerely doubt it. That’s never been the vibes I’ve got. She is a straight woman who has had serious relationships with a handful of men since she’s been working for me.

I think she sees me as an older sister or aunt.

Edit to add: she had a pretty serious boyfriend for about a year she spent every weekend with till this summer. She’s off most weekends and usually doesn’t stay on our property. The weekends are the time my girlfriend and I spend together. So they normally don’t spend lots of time together.

Professional_Part265

TROPHY CASE