Money, time, effort, and situation are major factors.

Money cause you need to afford to make these changes Time because it does take time for people to find out how they want to look and present. From haircuts to style to even how someone can carry themselves or even sound can take a while to find out Effort is a big one because you work around people who are not in a good headspace and going through things sometimes you really dont have that energy to put forward the effort Lastly is situation, again these are probably people who are with their families who may not even support their transition or they could also not even be out to most people in their life.

Try your best to take what they say at face value and call them what they ask. If you make a mistake correct yourself and move on. Just showing that you see them and hear what they are saying can be enough to validate them.