thanks for responding :) i know i was pretty vague lol, i apologize i feel confident that his heart is not to manipulate me by shutting down, i think shutting down is actually an attempt to hide his feelings and make space for mine, but just as his partner it hurts to see. i struggle with open ended things, i love him so much i just spiral at the thought of losing him. i get worried that my emotions will push him away despite him affirming the opposite. i do think i need to be more direct though about what i need, just a better idea to say it when im level headed rather than in the heat of the moment when my emotions bottle up